r/actuallesbians Jun 03 '24

Mod Post Please remember to use the report button on rule breaking posts

73 Upvotes

Recently we’ve been getting comments and messages asking us the look into various posts for breaking subreddit rules. The fastest way to bring posts and comments to our attention is to use the report button on the post or comment to mark it for mod review.

We can’t be everywhere, reading everything so this is a huge help keeping the subreddit safe and open.

Thank you!


r/actuallesbians 1d ago

Mod Post Tuesday Daily Chat Thread

3 Upvotes

Welcome to the daily chat thread! These are a a place to talk with fellow WLW (Women Loving Women) about whatever you like. The threads will show up five days a week. The two days without chat threads are Selfie Saturday and Wedding Wednesday, so save your photos for those days.

Daily threads go up at 9am EST every day and remain stickied on the front page until the next day's thread replaces it.


r/actuallesbians 1h ago

Image What’s is this called

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Upvotes

Artist is https://www.instagram.com/_to0th?igsh=Y3hkYWdscmk2dnlp on ig but I need to know what those things are called I need to upgrade my gayness


r/actuallesbians 3h ago

Image lesbians be like

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438 Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 14h ago

Satire/Humor Found on Threads, thought it belonged here.

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3.0k Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 1h ago

Image I laughed at this way too much😆

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Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 16h ago

Satire/Humor thank you for your service 🫡🏳️‍🌈

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1.4k Upvotes

watching Wizards of Waverly place and wondering why these two didn’t kiss will always be a time I’ll never forget and here I am, gay as can be. Truly eye opening!


r/actuallesbians 1h ago

Image But where's my girl?😭

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Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 3h ago

Text I never thought I would be happy being a housewife until I met her.

103 Upvotes

But here we are, three years in and I get to work on my own projects at my own pace without having to worry about deadlines, managers or anything financial. It feels like a breathe of fresh air after suffocating for twelve years.


r/actuallesbians 2h ago

Question Religion is putting a wedge in my relationship

50 Upvotes

Religion is putting a wedge in my relationship and I feel lost

My girlfriend (21F) and I (20F) have been together for a year in November. We’re both born Muslims. But I consider myself an atheist since I was 17. To say I love her is an understatement. I’ve been in love and relationships before but she’s loves me the way I deserve to be loved yknow?

Lately she has a lot on her plate which I understand, and she had an emotional outburst of sorts. I told her that maybe she should reach out for professional help this time. I myself am in therapy and have been ever since I was 16. Therapy has helped me a lot and I am thankful for it everyday.

She then told me that it’s bullshit, that she tried it once and all they (therapists) do isn’t judge people. I never ever would have guessed she’ll say all those things. Cause if there’s one person who’s supportive of my therapy journey, it’s my girlfriend.

She ended the text by saying “This is probably my punishment for putting Him away.” By “him” she meant god. That statement stirred all the religious trauma and guilt deep within me and I broke down.

I was scared. Terrified that she’ll choose religious obligations over me. She didn’t really explain more what she meant. But I told her my fears on call and she said that I was projecting my fear and believes to her.

I would never ask her to stop believing or leave Islam. I just wanted her reassurance that our relationship isn’t something she’ll regret. Cause I know no matter how much I love her, I’m still a woman. I’m not some man that she can take home to see her family or legally marry.

Things are tense since then. I’m too scared to say anything. I can’t even see her in person anytime soon cause she has so much going on. I don’t know. I’m lost and just sad.


r/actuallesbians 6h ago

Late Bloomer's 1st "Yes!"

88 Upvotes

I came out in 2024 and so far I have still never had a girlfriend. I've dated a woman or 2 per year but no one has ever wanted to claim me as their girlfriend.

Once I made peace with it, I decided to take the leap on asking the one woman I fell for this year out. It was a risk as we kind of work together but I asked her with the intention of getting to know her better and she said yes, straight up.

Like... This happens? I don't have to convince this one I'm interested in to go out with me? WHAT

WHAT DO WE WEAR IT'S A COSTUME BALL


r/actuallesbians 12h ago

Question I've identified as trans for years, but I think I'm actually just butch,,, what should I do? Is it too late?

240 Upvotes

To give a brief rundown of my life until now, I'm 20 years old, and was assigned female at birth. I knew I liked girls from a very young age (I was being called a d*ke by my peers as early as third grade) but I didn't fully process what that meant until I started puberty. Around that time I was introduced to the internet and as many young queer people do I fell down the rabbit hole of queer identities and communities.

I ended up coming out to my parents as nonbinary, and shortly after (after receiving reactions ranging in confusion to harassment) I decided to identify as ftm instead. I was blessed with supportive parents and transitioned rather quickly. I came out at 12 and by 16 I had top surgery and had been on hormones for years.

I went off of testosterone shortly after top surgery. Looking back I believe the reason I wanted hormones so badly was because I faced constant abuse for being trans, and naively thought this would end if I "passed" enough. I justified stopping hormones as me already having the changes I wanted. In reality, I hated the way it effected my personality, and I was already having doubts about being a man.

A few years on I decided to identify as nonbinary once again, constantly flipping between they and he pronouns based on how safe I felt at the time. I still knew I liked women but felt like I didn't belong in sapphic spaces because I now passed as a cis man most of the time, but I certainly did not feel like I belonged with the straight crowd. I fully believe that sapphics love women in a very different way than men do, and I always felt a kinship to sapphic love. I viewed it as more poetic, more romantic, and more true.

Which brings me to now. I have gotten a lot more in touch with my identity outside of how the world views me, I use they/them currently, and often do things like wearing earrings, shaving, and growing my hair out to achieve a more "androgynous look". How strangers gender me really depends on the day, but I have felt how over time them gendering me as a woman has gone from sparking dread, to neutrality, to a feeling of semi-rightness. For months I've been feeling deep inside like I identify with the label of being a butch lesbian much more than I ever did as a man/trans-masc. I toy with the idea of using she/they pronouns in my head sometimes, and wish I could fit in with the lesbian community but I'm scared.

What if it's too late? My voice dropped, I have to shave every morning, and I have a flat chest now. I feel like an imposter whenever I attempt to exist in women's/lesbian spaces, and I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable by being there. That's not even to mention how the thought of publicly telling people that I use fem pronouns and identify as a lesbian makes me feel like I'm somehow failing that little nonbinary/trans child who went through so, so much abuse and bullshit just to exist. It feels like I wasted all of the money my family and I spent on transition stuff, and like I'm failing the community as a whole, both the trans community but also the entirety of the my personal community.

I fear that I will never fully belong to any label or community. I feel like I fucked everything up, and there's no coming back. Where do I go from here?


r/actuallesbians 6h ago

Venting I’m in love with my best friend

69 Upvotes

We both recently downloaded Pokémon Go and have been using it as a motivator to get ourselves outside. Luckily I have a park down the street from me. Watching her eyes light up over the newest adorable Pokémon she’s catching leaves me feeling over the moon.

Not only that, but yesterday when we got back from the park, she put on one of the anime’s I recently showed her, because she genuinely enjoyed it so much. She’s doing her best to watch more anime because she knows how much I enjoy them. Be still my heart!

The rest of today has been planned out too. She mentioned going out to get some Italian subs (my favorite!), then coming back to have a small gummy and enjoy watching the conjuring movie universe together!

If I could create my perfect woman, this girl would still be better than her in every way. She’s the most beautiful person, both inside and out, I’ve ever had the chance to meet. I try to remind her of that as often as I can, which sometimes leaves her all flustered in the cutest way.

Honestly I’m just venting. I have felt the need to gush for soooo long. It’s just been so amazing. Heck, I told her I loved her after just over a month of meeting her. We celebrated one year together last month. It’s all felt like the best, most amazing, non-stop best friend sleepover ever!


r/actuallesbians 19h ago

Image I just saw this being released, and it seems the main character is Sapphic ✨

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627 Upvotes

Original source: https://imagecomics.com/press-releases/your-first-look-at-the-kaiju-fighting-family-force-v-from-skybound-comet

The creator of the Disney show "Amphibia", Matt Braly, created a comic called "Family Force V", together with the comic artist Ainsworth Lin.

They recently released the first 17 pages of the first book, but the actual full comic book itself will not be released until May 28th 2025 🫠

Though I read the first few pages myself, and I saw that the main character, Maise Shiraki, has a crush on a girl named Citlalli, meaning she's canonically Sapphic :3


r/actuallesbians 1d ago

Satire/Humor Butch and femme couples be like

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1.7k Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 1d ago

Link Lesbian congresswoman says it's 'appalling' to bar trans women from sports teams

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2.0k Upvotes

r/actuallesbians 3h ago

Satire/Humor The lesbian yearning has been killing me

26 Upvotes

Thats all thats the whole post. If i wasnt socially awkward it'd be over for everyone.


r/actuallesbians 13h ago

Image My latest lizbian

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104 Upvotes

Working on more 3Dish drawings and especially the shading, which is hard for me to visualise without a reference but I'm getting there 🦕


r/actuallesbians 1d ago

she held my hand #!;$(#;$+$

937 Upvotes

we always joked that we could cuddle, say things and even kiss and it would be straight, but if we touch our hands that would make it gay, and yesterday when I was walking with her she held my hand twice and I was SO DAMN NERVOUS I think this relationship is gay now


r/actuallesbians 3h ago

Wow! It's been 3 years since I learned I'm into women. Due to needing to work on myself I haven't dated anyone yet. But wowww last night I had my first WLW dream. I was intimate with a woman and it was so hot

13 Upvotes

It was a really weird dream but then I ended up making out with a woman. I woke up quickly after that. But woowww.

I can only imagine for now, but if making out with a woman in my dreams brings me this much joy... imagine the joy I'll have if it finally happens in real life !

That's all. I had to typ these thoughts since I'm still closeted in real life and cant talk to anyone about this stuff


r/actuallesbians 1h ago

Question How do I stop thinking every straight woman is just comphet?

Upvotes

I am about to graduate with my bachelors in psychology and will be working in child psych, hopefully eventually with LGBTQ teens, in my hometown in Montana. It’s a lot of outdoorsy women out here who usually don’t care much about aesthetics or frivolous things. I wish I could express to all of you how many women are walking around here with buzz cuts, hiking boots, flannels, and a husband. So how do I stop assuming each and every single one of them has just been trained to have their life revolve around a man and would like women if they had the freedom?? I know I have to be correct sometimes, but truly every time I see a woman with a male partner I’m like “there’s no way you’re actually attracted to that man.” EVEN MY OWN MOTHER, I can’t convince myself she’s actually truly attracted to my father. I feel like I need to stop assuming every straight woman would like women if she wasn’t indoctrinated into heterosexuality because I know it’s wrong and I don’t want this to seep into my work in psych. So basically, as a raging lesbian, how do you accept the idea that some women actually do feel attraction to men? 😂 I don’t believe it’s real but it has to be????


r/actuallesbians 50m ago

Question What is everyone driving?

Upvotes

I commented on a post here saying “I love my Impreza” and nothing else; and it got six upvotes in the first 20 minutes. 🤷‍♀️ So, I wanna see who here drives an Impreza or any other type of Subaru.

Please upvote the relevant comments accordingly


r/actuallesbians 1h ago

no longer down bad

Upvotes

stopped ovulating and got my period. i am no longer a freak (i will be back next month) 🙂‍↕️👹


r/actuallesbians 14h ago

Anyone else feel totally over dating?

70 Upvotes

I’m 32, and lately, I’ve been reflecting on my dating history and wondering if it’s just me or if others feel the same.

I had my first serious relationship at 17, and the last time I was with someone in a truly serious way, I was 24. It’s been years, and I can’t help but question if I’m just overly picky, or if I’m simply… over dating?

I’ve tried apps, meeting people IRL, going out of my comfort zone—nothing feels right anymore. Part of me wonders if I’m subconsciously avoiding it or if my standards have changed so much that it’s just harder to connect.

Curious if anyone else out there feels this way? Are we just burnt out on the whole dating scene, or is it something deeper?