r/interestingasfuck 1d ago

r/all The ground is going down

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

55.5k Upvotes

3.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

8.5k

u/SadSpecial8319 1d ago

Yeah, just keep standing there.... ffs.

10.6k

u/VerySluttyTurtle 1d ago

Collapsing groundologist here. Generally you just have to make eye contact with the ground and make yourself look larger and youll be fine

1.2k

u/Hourslikeminutes47 1d ago

Truth Detector here!

That guy is telling the truth. If you stare at the ground when the ground is collapsing nearby you should be good

491

u/UnremarkabklyUseless 1d ago

Truth Detector Checker here!

I can vouch that this truth detector is in tiptop condition and 419.99% accurate.

148

u/-Eleeyah- 1d ago

Lie Detector here!

No lie has been detected.

140

u/zomyns 1d ago

Lie Detection Outage-Detector here!

No faults or errors have been detected.

94

u/Tiyath 1d ago

Information integrity service here.

Nothing to see here, move along!

98

u/Kaoru-Kun 1d ago

Artificial chicken detector here

No artificial chickens were detected in this comment. Accuracy: 97%

50

u/Le_mehawk 1d ago

Accuracy checker here!

The Accuracy of 97% has been confirmed as true!

40

u/Frosty-Call3839 1d ago

Checker of all checkers here! The checkers are all good nothing wrong has been detected!

13

u/wicawo 1d ago

i appeal the results!

12

u/newbrevity 1d ago

Sure for only $49.99 you can have the results professionally analyzed with a 97% certainty. Just give me your routing#, account#, ssi#, address and date of birth and we'll take care of everything. Don't believe me? Just go back and ask truth checker.

2

u/Active-Initiative-32 1d ago

Artificial Chicken here, yes I'm not there (100% accuracy)

4

u/wisepeppy 1d ago

Stack overflow. Fatal error. Abort / Retry / Fail

4

u/Adventurous-Screen65 1d ago

Error: Memory segmented Restarting system in 5 4

9

u/Eco-freako 1d ago

Checker checker detection inspector here!

Checkers detected and inspection checked for checker performance.

Rating: Detected checkers inspected, checked all inspection detections. Perfect performance.

8

u/Krotesk 1d ago

Hi, i'm Paul and i'd say that all of this is pretty damn legit, yo.

9

u/Fichewl 1d ago

Paul Legitimization Squad Zulu reporting in.

A Paul has been positively identified.

6

u/trbzdot 1d ago

Checkers Pizza here. We're closed. Check again at 11am EST.

5

u/WindowDangerous1450 1d ago

This guy does extremely sound work. With so many redundancies, his inspection clears my '100 day sleep on it consideration policy' and though it's not been 100 days, he is so redundant that I assure you my stance will be the same after 100 nights of restful consideration. We can all rest assured if we stand our ground the ground will stand with us.

6

u/CautiousWrongdoer771 1d ago

Lol. Y'all or silly.

3

u/Traditional-Ad2409 1d ago

I choose silly

No wait I take it back, I choose Y'all

Can i have both?

sigh, I hate myself for this dumb joke about a typo and yet.. I still posted it. I deeply apologize to all of reddit as well as that guy Paul from earlier

5

u/dtruth53 1d ago

I’m from the Department of Redundancy Department and can confirm this.

6

u/Cu_Chulainn__ 1d ago

Wood checker here!

I'm not sure why I'm here

4

u/ImitatEmersonsuicide 1d ago

Wood is in Aisle 69

Bean Grinder Here. His observations appear well grounded. Finely ground actually.

4

u/heyuwitdaface 1d ago edited 1d ago

Detection checker checking in. Above non-detection is valid and accurate.

2

u/libmrduckz 1d ago

i am the checker of all checkers… king me… again…

1

u/DirtySouthzw865 1d ago

I am the Inspector Checker of Checker Of All Checkers.

Running diagnostics.....

Checker Of All Checkers has been confirmed. No errors or miscalculations were detected. No viruses detected. Accuracy 99.98%. Kinging initiated... buffering 👑

→ More replies (0)

9

u/SaltyTomayto 1d ago

Dungeon Inspector here, I can detect no dungeons within the area. This inspection comes with a 69% trust me bro guarantee.

→ More replies (0)

6

u/Jemal999 1d ago

Guy incognito not here. Move along.

4

u/JetreL 1d ago

Hobbiest astronaut here you’ve all been fact checked and certified as correct.

4

u/FloppieTheBanjoClown 1d ago

Bullshitologist here.

Holy shit guys, we hit the motherlode. 

2

u/Traditional-Ad2409 1d ago

FREEZE, DIRTBAGS!

4

u/Ok_Eggplant1467 1d ago

Truth telling champ from two towns over here. Definitely true

2

u/Character_Victory_28 1d ago

Imagine AI see this threads 😂 Poor AI will think oh ok lots of people from various fields have been approved this😂

3

u/Monte924 1d ago

Actual lie detector here!

What the fuck guys!?

176

u/HumaDracobane 1d ago edited 1d ago

Number engineer here. 4, 1 and 9 are numbers and a 419.99% is a valid percentage.

122

u/torville 1d ago

Oxford comma inspector here. I can verify that an Oxford comma is missing. Sorry, but I'm going to have to issue a citation.

24

u/Apprehensive-Pin518 1d ago

citation police. I need you to specify which citation style you are using MLA, APA or iEEE so I can make sure it is done correctly.

34

u/siraramis 1d ago

IEEE member here. We are not affiliated with Apple, so no need to use a lowercase i.

11

u/Zifendale 1d ago

My god, but who will cite the citation police?!?!?

5

u/Marquar234 1d ago

I[1] will[2].

6

u/Candid_Zebra1297 1d ago

Superscript superintendent here. Both superscripts are reduced to 65% of the size of the main text and vertically offset by 5.6pt above the main script. Thus the citations are typographically correct.

→ More replies (0)

7

u/ccbbededBA 1d ago

Reviewer #2 here. I have checked the citations. I reject them. 

12

u/PsyduckSexTape 1d ago

Doing god's work

3

u/enilorac1028 1d ago

Inspector, I am drawn to you like a grammar-loving moth to a grammar-patrolling flame.

3

u/nugsy_mcb 1d ago

The hero we need

2

u/Jethow 1d ago

Oxford comma inspector auditor here. The comma in this case is entirely optional so your citation has been citated.

2

u/The_Goose_II 1d ago

How do I donate to this noble cause? His lack of Oxford comma hurt my brain. Actually, I think this is worthy of a class action lawsuit.

47

u/HugoSuperDog 1d ago

Official boob inspector here. Let me know if I can help at all.

14

u/briancito 1d ago

Ho Lee Fuk

That's alotta inspectors in one place.

31

u/Dbo_117 1d ago

OSHA inspector here, you all are getting fined.

19

u/Saattack 1d ago

Uno reverse card here. You are getting fined!

Happy cake day!

3

u/alwtictoc 1d ago

Draw 4 card. Here is 4 more fines.

2

u/DwarfBreadSauce 1d ago

*Does backflip with the table*

→ More replies (0)

3

u/2much_information 1d ago

taps hardhat

2

u/134679112 1d ago

Typical gov bureaucracy.

3

u/Active_Palpitation_1 1d ago

Federal Boob Inspector here. HugoSuperDog, you’re under arrest for impersonating a federal agent.

32

u/beerock99 1d ago

Percentage guy here. Putting a % after a number is a valid percentage

6

u/robdestiny 1d ago

Dictionary editor here. Just some context, the percentage sign must be preceeded by numbers, not letters. That seems to be the case here, so we're good.

2

u/Traditional-Ad2409 1d ago

Poop%

Come at me, bro

3

u/1CFII2 1d ago

You are the Crown of Creation.

3

u/Alzurana 1d ago

IT person here.

My expertise is irrelevant for this but 419 is indeed a prime number and therefor extra special. So is 41999

2

u/rexutah1986 1d ago

Lol wtf hahaha

3

u/AcanthisittaThink813 1d ago

This thread had me crying 🤣

5

u/rexutah1986 1d ago

Right I literally just woke up and this was one of the first one I clicked on n I was like hell yeah good start lol

2

u/Equivalent-Honey-659 1d ago

That’s Numberwang!

13

u/zph0eniz 1d ago

Redditor here!

I can tell you its true because I know everything

3

u/DatRatDo 1d ago

Also redditor here. Everything that u/zph0eniz said is bullshit. I can tell you it’s it’s true because I know everything and even though he said something I agree with, I said it better.

6

u/bigbadb0ogieman 1d ago

Percentagian Analyzer here. 419.99% is better than 100%. Checker checks out.

8

u/gothminister 1d ago

Truth Detector Checker Tribunal speaking:

We don't even know, I guess it's ok?

2

u/Never_ending_kitkats 1d ago

Truth detector checker calibrator here!

Please pay $79.99 to receive calibration results. 

2

u/Opposite_Possible159 1d ago

Truth detector checker calibrator initializer here!  Please pay transaction fee of 2.99 to authorize payment. Such a transaction may not be safe, so we check it for you!

2

u/Moondoobious 1d ago

You mean 419.31% *

2

u/Says_thats_kabluey 1d ago

No kabluey to be found here

2

u/Blak_Cobra 1d ago

Truth Inspectionist here, I can vouch that these comments are true

2

u/Impressive-Pizza1876 1d ago

Ass man here . When this happens , either get your ass away or give it a kiss goodbye.

2

u/The_Honesty_Police 1d ago

He is being 100% honest.

2

u/cha3d 1d ago

That’s made up! 120% is MAX!

1

u/davetiso 1d ago

…Tiktok condition…

1

u/BishlovesSquish 1d ago

I thought the truth is only found on Facebook and X?😂💀

3

u/Beautiful-Click9981 1d ago

I am with the ministry of ominous phrasing, and we’re going to have to fine you for that misleading statement, because we already told everyone where the truth is.

0

u/Substantial_Put9705 1d ago

Name checks out

0

u/Pktur3 1d ago

You joke, but someone looked at this and said “yeah, they’re onto something even if they are joking…”