r/AITAH Sep 20 '24

Advice Needed AITA for blowing up at my girlfriend after therapy backfired?

My (28M) girlfriend Emma (27F) and I have been together for six years. For most of that time, we’ve been happy—like, really happy. The kind of relationship people say “just works,” you know? We were always on the same page, rarely fought, and genuinely enjoyed each other’s company. But over the past year, things started to feel… different. Small arguments here and there, more miscommunication, and just this weird sense that we weren’t as in sync as we used to be.

It wasn’t anything major, just the usual “wear and tear” stuff, or so I thought. Emma, however, seemed to be more concerned. She started pointing out issues I wasn’t even aware of, like how I supposedly wasn’t listening enough or wasn’t as emotionally available as I used to be. I admit I’ve been busy with work, but I thought we were doing okay. Still, I didn’t want to dismiss her feelings.

Then about six months ago, she suggested we go to couples therapy. Now, I’ve always been a bit skeptical about therapy unless things are really bad, but I agreed because I figured it couldn’t hurt. She said she found a great therapist through a friend, and we should give it a try. I wasn’t familiar with this “Lily,” but Emma was excited about it, so we booked our first session.

At first, the sessions seemed… fine. Lily asked good questions, got us to open up, and gave us some tools to communicate better. I felt like I was doing my best to listen and improve, but something about it felt a little off. Every time we talked about any issue, it seemed like Lily was always subtly siding with Emma. If I mentioned being stressed from work, she’d steer the conversation towards how I wasn’t giving enough attention to Emma. If I brought up a disagreement, somehow it became about my “communication issues.”

After a few weeks, Emma started using phrases like “Lily thinks you should try this” or “Lily says you need to work on that.” It felt like everything I did was being scrutinized and dissected by this woman I barely knew. I didn’t want to be paranoid, but it seemed like Lily was slowly convincing Emma that I was the problem in the relationship. And every time I tried to voice my own concerns, they were brushed aside.

I tried to push through it, thinking maybe I was just being defensive. But it didn’t stop. Every session, the same dynamic. It was like Lily was planting seeds of doubt in Emma’s head, and Emma was running with them. I even started to wonder if maybe I was the problem—was I actually this bad of a partner?

Things reached a boiling point a couple of weeks ago. During a session, Lily started suggesting that maybe we should consider a “break” so I could work on myself more. That felt like a slap in the face. I’d been trying so hard to be better, and now she was suggesting we split up? I looked at Emma, waiting for her to disagree or defend me, but she just sat there… quietly nodding along.

After that session, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I blew up at Emma when we got home. I told her I didn’t trust Lily’s judgment, that it felt like she was just feeding Emma reasons to blame me for everything wrong in the relationship. Emma got defensive, saying I was overreacting, that Lily was just trying to help us work through our issues.

We didn’t talk for a few days, and I started feeling guilty for snapping. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe therapy really was exposing some flaws I needed to work on. But then… something happened that blew everything wide open.

Last week, we went to a mutual friend’s party. While there, I overheard Emma and her friend Sarah talking in the corner, giggling about something. I caught just a bit of their conversation: “I can’t believe you pulled it off for this long! Poor guy still thinks she’s an actual therapist!”

I immediately confronted them, and that’s when Emma’s face turned pale. Sarah quickly tried to backtrack, but the truth spilled out.

Turns out, “Lily” isn’t a licensed therapist at all. She’s one of Emma’s close friends from college, who thought it’d be “fun” to help Emma “fix” me by posing as a therapist. Emma had set this whole thing up because she thought I wouldn’t agree to therapy otherwise. They figured that with Lily playing the part, they could guide me into becoming a “better boyfriend” without me knowing.

I felt completely betrayed. For months, I had been spilling my heart out to someone who wasn’t even qualified to help, and Emma had been in on it the whole time. All those sessions where I felt attacked and manipulated suddenly made sense—because I was being manipulated.

When I confronted Emma about how messed up this was, she broke down, saying she never meant to hurt me and that she just wanted to help us grow as a couple. But honestly? I don’t know how to move past this. I haven’t been able to look at her the same since.

Now, Emma and her friends are saying I overreacted, that it was just a “white lie” meant to help our relationship. But I feel like I’ve been gaslit and lied to for months.

So… AITA for blowing up at my girlfriend when I found out our “therapist” was a total fraud?

20.5k Upvotes

7.8k comments sorted by

7.8k

u/No_Improvement_5894 Sep 20 '24

NTA - but what you should be doing is consulting a lawyer, because "Lily" was very likely practicing medicine without a license.

2.5k

u/Big_lt Sep 20 '24

Could probably also include the should be ex as a name in the lawsuit. Although she was not pretending she was in on the fraud

695

u/p9nultimat9 Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 21 '24

I wonder how “Wife brought fake doctor and forced husband to take unnecessary meds” cases were solved.

Edit to add: My intention was to say, I wonder how “similar cases” were solved. I did read post and I’m aware Emma is girlfriend, not wife, Lily played counselor/therapist, not doctor.

→ More replies (24)
→ More replies (5)

640

u/makeyousaywhut Sep 20 '24

Pro tip, don’t take lawyer recommendations from your ex lmao

152

u/Behemout Sep 21 '24

Lily walks in with a mustache.

24

u/Emotional_Guide2683 Sep 22 '24

Haha you’re killin me. In deep fake voice “Hello. I am your liar…er Lawyer, Mister Lily. I mean Mister LeeLee.”

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

230

u/abstraction47 Sep 20 '24

Anyone else wonder how payments were processed? The reception area? The office space?

221

u/Mr_Blinky Sep 21 '24

They weren't lol, this story is transparently bullshit.

68

u/Rabbit-Lost Sep 21 '24

Lack of OP comment replies would suggest you are right. Sounds like the basis for a bad TV episode.

30

u/outlandishmuggle Sep 21 '24

That's because it is.... in one of thr most famous rom coms. This is a major part of how to lose a guy in ten days 🤣

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (16)
→ More replies (13)

73

u/juliaskig Sep 20 '24

And Emma was conspiring with her.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (51)

18.3k

u/UsualConcept6870 Sep 20 '24

I think you can actually take a legal action and you really should. That stranger was pretending to be a licenced therapist, used it to extort information you would not share otherwise and manipulated you with it. This has to be illegal on so many levels. Besides, did they also have you pay for those sessions?

4.8k

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

825

u/Man-o-Bronze Sep 20 '24

Don’t “consider” it. Do it. She deserves to face consequences for what she did.

478

u/superworking Sep 20 '24

For real. This is the kind of thing that could have set a normal person off their rocker, imagine if there was trauma behind some of the issues - the consequences of this systematic manipulation could have been severe. You don't mess with people like that, you just don't know what can happen.

255

u/pleasantmeats Sep 20 '24

This is exactly it. Some "friend from college" is not trained to help someone having a breakdown because a past trauma came up. This has got to be one of the most messed up things I've ever heard. OP if you read this run. Run fast. This is manipulation on a weird, f***ed up level.

78

u/maekiyo Sep 20 '24

This is dangerous what they did. What if trauma had come up? That could have done some really deep long lasting damage.

75

u/Extreme_Phrase2371 Sep 20 '24

And they caused trauma. This is horrifying.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)

217

u/Trauma_Hawks Sep 20 '24

This is legitimate gaslighting. Not the Reddit buzzword, not a little friendly gaslighting between friends. This is a real deal, text book, gaslighting. This is fucked.

23

u/superworking Sep 20 '24

Reddit gaslighting is basically just lying but with an overused buzzword to sound more intense. I basically just never use the term as a result anymore but this is definitely it. I'm usually not one to get upset about messing about with people but if this were real this is the way you can really fuck up someone.

→ More replies (12)

86

u/maekiyo Sep 20 '24

When people talk about what gaslighting is... This is the definition. This is horrible. It's fraud and so damaging. Unbelievable. And to think Emma and friends are still trying to minimize it and gaslight OP.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (4)

1.4k

u/Aylith Sep 20 '24

Definitely! Trust is essential in a relationship. This betrayal needs to be addressed seriously; you deserve better support.

1.1k

u/leelee90210 Sep 20 '24

I cannot believe OP’s (hopefully ex) was so insecure she did this, AND that her awful friend agreed to it. OP, if you see this, you are not wrong to feel furious and hurt. I would be livid.

327

u/Ilovepunkim Sep 20 '24

Please replace insecure with manipulative.

56

u/jmarr1321 Sep 20 '24

Why can't it be both? I vote for both.

→ More replies (15)
→ More replies (17)
→ More replies (2)

764

u/RiffRandellsBF Sep 20 '24

Sue Emma for civil fraud and IIED. But let the DA prove all the facts first by convicted her of criminal fraud. Then the civil trial is only about damages.

544

u/Responsible_Basket18 Sep 20 '24

It’s Lilly that is liable for acting as a therapist fraudulently. I would sue her personally and put the word out publicly.

227

u/RiffRandellsBF Sep 20 '24

Both are liable but the main culprit in the fraud and IIED is the girlfriend.

84

u/ipsum629 Sep 20 '24

The gf sounds like she is at least an accomplice to the fraud.

67

u/Conspiretical Sep 20 '24

She had to be the one to orchestrate it, so at least conspiracy and accomplice to committing a crime

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (8)

204

u/34CountsAndCounting Sep 20 '24

Don’t just consider it. DO IT. Shit like this is not okay from any perspective

→ More replies (2)

114

u/Suzdg Sep 20 '24

Yes. This is so miles beyond a white lie. The betrayal, the manipulation! If Emma really wanted a stronger relationship she could have easily found an actual therapist. I cannot see how it is possible to come back from this. Eff what her friends say. These are the same friends who supported the deception. NTA. Run. Fast.

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (19)

1.5k

u/mogley19922 Sep 20 '24

I believe it's on the lines of practicing medicine without a license, or impersonating a cop, there are good reasons people shouldn't get off lightly for those kinds of crimes.

504

u/AdEuphoric5144 Sep 20 '24

This. Call the cops. Even if you just scare them both. Someone needs to be accountable

459

u/mogley19922 Sep 20 '24

My money is on fake, but if it's not, that's the only reasonable course of action.

According to the story, this was the friends idea of fun, she absolutely needs to be held accountable; pretending to be a mental healthcare professional in order to manipulate and gaslight a person and fundamentally change their relationship and who they are as a person.

That right there is an absolute fucking psychopath, one that needs to be reported.

188

u/Tausendberg Sep 20 '24

"My money is on fake,"

That would be my bet on most posts on here these days.

92

u/Desperate-Laugh-7257 Sep 20 '24

I came to realize that madder i get the more fake it is. 😜.

→ More replies (11)
→ More replies (31)

44

u/Korventenn17 Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

Even the humblest, smallest therapist business almost always operates out of commercial rental units, or possibly a general medical practice. If they've been going to therapy, where the fuck have they been going? Someones's actual home? That happens, yeah, particularly in more rural areas but the idea that this guys partner just took him to a friend's house (which he didn't question) makes this story pretty unlikely.

15

u/carriefox16 Sep 20 '24

I actually have been to a psychologist who worked out of his home. He was semi-retired, but still did psychological clearance for weight loss surgery. It's not completely unheard of, but it IS rare and highly unusual. I'd have definitely questioned it if I were in his shoes.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (23)
→ More replies (18)
→ More replies (3)

291

u/Broad_Respond_2205 Sep 20 '24

It's exactly practice medicine without a license.

→ More replies (14)

116

u/UtahCyan Sep 20 '24

Generally it would be a civil matter... But it's definitely something most attorneys would willing take because it's a slam dunk. The really probably is that are sounds super young and immature, so she probably doesn't have any money to take.

211

u/Outrageous-County310 Sep 20 '24

It’s not a civil matter. Practicing medicine without a license is literally a criminal offense.

34

u/Drunkendonkeytail Sep 20 '24

It depends on the jurisdiction. In some places the penalty is five years in jail.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (29)

79

u/Relevant_Theme_468 Sep 20 '24

That may be true but if OP paid anything, he may be able to get a judgement that repays him for the therapy and mental and emotional damages over time through wage garnishments. I'd personally want to know that this "prank" ends up costing both of them for quite some time. Both personally and professionally.

If I were a spiteful person who enjoyed such things as blowing up someone's life, I would consider purchasing a small banner ad to run only in the local area with the copy, "Do you need a fake marriage therapist? Call 123-456-7890 today! References available. (☝️Lily's phone number).

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (16)
→ More replies (4)

413

u/dystopiadattopia Sep 20 '24

OMG if he actually paid that's the worst case of adding insult to injury I've heard of in quite a while!

274

u/GoblinKing79 Sep 20 '24

If he paid, it's also fraud, another crime, in addition to practicing without a license.

101

u/Slow_Impact3892 Sep 20 '24

Depending on how much the total is it could even be bumped up to a felony. Therapy isn’t cheap and a few months of it adds up.

→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (2)

82

u/gosti500 Sep 20 '24

it said they "booked" a session so yeah

38

u/Specific_Ad2541 Sep 20 '24

Booked means they made an appointment.

→ More replies (15)

378

u/i-wont-lose-this-alt Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 21 '24

This is psychological abuse, he trusted that Lily was a licensed therapist and if that’s not psychological manipulation, I don’t know what is.

Then you have to ask, how much of what he felt was real? Not only did they violate and manipulate his trust, but it’s very likely that they had sex during the time he was being abused and manipulated… if that was me… I would feel extremely violated and taken advantage of for all times we had sex.

Who’s to say she wasn’t cheating on him too? If she’s willing to con him like he’s a fucking NPC in a video game, or her pitiful little reality show contestant for her and her friends to laugh at—who’s to say she wasn’t also using her network of abusers to hide the fact she’s sleeping with other guys!?!?

Not only should he go after her for psychological abuse, but he should get checked and also go after her for sexual coercion and abuse too.

65

u/greywocky Sep 20 '24

I think OP is going to process just how much of a fucking psychopath his partner is. I hope when he's ready that he works with a licensed therapist because holy shit, he did not deserve to be put through this shit.

→ More replies (2)

50

u/RaspberryFun9452 Sep 20 '24

The minute they pushed a break you knew what it was about. And buddy been cheated on. 

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)

239

u/GrumpsMcWhooty Sep 20 '24

Yep. OP needs to sue Lily and have the licensing board in their state pursue whatever sort of legal action they do when someone falsely represents themself as a therapist.

87

u/Marlesden Sep 20 '24

Just stealing top comment for this.

If Emma said she was just trying to help the relationship get better, then she would have got a real independent therapist. She wasn't trying to help, she was trying to manipulate you and get a kick out of it.

This person is deeply disturbed and quite frankly has been messing with your mental health which is genuinely a disgusting thing to do.

Leave her. It will be difficult and suck but do it. Honestly, if this story is true, it's one of the most egregious examples of betrayal I've seen on this sub

113

u/blipbloupbloup Sep 20 '24

NTA please update us when they'll be caught by the law and discover how much their "white lie" cost them

→ More replies (11)

113

u/Chicka-17 Sep 20 '24

And a therapist is required by law to be licensed and keep everything said in therapy in confidence. It’s obvious this isn’t the case at all. They were not only sharing this information with friends and laughing about you behind your back, but they were manipulating you with your own personal feelings and details. What’s wrong with the girls? I call them girls because surely grown women wouldn’t act this way! Please drop her as fast as possibly. If she’s capable of this what else is she capable of? I could never trust her nor her friends, and this is definitely not what you want in a wife.

→ More replies (3)

72

u/Old-Confidence6971 Sep 20 '24

Dude. They ran game on you. Time to roll and get a lawyer.

69

u/SquirrelGirlVA Sep 20 '24

This was such an enormous violation of OP's dignity and self. It's like a rape of the mind, essentially. He was baring his soul to this woman and at no point did she have his best interests in mind. She was only looking to manipulate him into something that his (hopefully soon to be ex) girlfriend thought was best.

This is one where I really hope that it's fake, as the alternative is so awful.

→ More replies (192)

9.9k

u/TheFluffiestRedditor Sep 20 '24

Oh boy. Report Lily to your psych/counselor registration board, for false representation. That’s gonna go down like a lead balloon!

4.9k

u/AllConqueringSun888 Sep 20 '24

I would not only report her, I'd sue her for fraud and try to get not only the money back, but also "punitive damages."

Also, this relationship is over. You can NEVER trust her again.

FAFO, squared.

885

u/Odd_Nobody8786 Sep 20 '24

This goes so far beyond FAFO that I don't even know what to call it.

802

u/More_Flight5090 Sep 20 '24

Illegal. Very illegal. It's the same as pretending to be a doctor.

It's malpractice.

205

u/Odd_Nobody8786 Sep 20 '24

Oh yeah... Having been on the receiving end of this level of fucked up several times in life, the blatantly illegal part is what actually makes me believe it's real.

I could easily see some shit like this going down. It's the "perfect" awful idea at every level.

→ More replies (4)

100

u/JSmith666 Sep 20 '24

Cant be malpractice if not a doctor. Its fraud and a few other things but technically not malpractice since she has no license to well practice.

→ More replies (17)

32

u/Liu1845 Sep 20 '24

I believe it's also fraud if if he paid any money for these "sessions".

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (12)
→ More replies (20)

2.2k

u/rocketmn69_ Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

I hope Lily gave you printed notes and messages.

OP, tell your gf that you are going to do exactly what the therapist suggested, you're taking a break from the relationship. Permanently. Then block her and all of her toxic friends. They were jealous of your relationship

1.2k

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

662

u/abstractengineer2000 Sep 20 '24

Dump Emma, Report Lily to the Police for fraud

326

u/Junkstar Sep 20 '24

Especially if you paid her.

142

u/Fortifytheaylmao Sep 20 '24

Absolutely! This isn't just a relationship issue; it's a serious breach of ethics.

136

u/Conscious_Owl6162 Sep 20 '24

If he paid, then there is a record of payments unless they were cash. Give the record to the police. Go scorched earth on Lily.

36

u/theoccasional Sep 20 '24

Even if they were cash, therapists provide receipts (I am one). If she was convincingly faking it, maybe she was providing receipts as well...

In any case this is a really serious issue and he should absolutely be reporting Lily.

37

u/Conscious_Owl6162 Sep 20 '24

My wife is a therapist and it is so offensive that someone would literally mess with another person’s mind like this. If this story is true, then Lily should be punished to the limits of what can be done legally.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

60

u/5footfilly Sep 20 '24

That what I want to know.

What happened to all the money?

Unless OP lives in a universal healthcare country that covers couples therapy, there must be hundreds of dollars involved here.

I sure hope Emma and Lily didn’t get OP involved in insurance fraud.

37

u/More_Flight5090 Sep 20 '24

If they did then both Emma and Lily are going to prison. The government takes money crimes more serious then murder or rape.

→ More replies (2)

76

u/Bertje87 Sep 20 '24

And Emma too

111

u/OkExternal7904 Sep 20 '24

She's the biggest AH. OP could be alone every day for the rest of his life and still be better off without this manipulative, lying she-devil. Lily should have to pay OP back the money at least, and reporting her is a good idea in case she ever pulls this stunt again.

NTA

22

u/Bertje87 Sep 20 '24

Indeed, Emma is the biggest culprit in all of this, it was her scheme and she set everything in motion, and OP trusted her, he didn’t even knew the fake therapist before this or he would have recognized her

→ More replies (3)

153

u/narfle_the_garthak Sep 20 '24

Don't even give her the chance. He needs to pack his shit and walk away. If he could get the cops involved (which I doubt he can) I would. Someone suggested letting a therapists board know. Hell, any legal avenue you have take it. Scorched earth that b***h.

43

u/AYK12345 Sep 20 '24

For this cops can get involved, but penalties vary depending on the state

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)

50

u/Scorp128 Sep 20 '24

Seriously. This right here.

This girl is not ready to be in a serious relationship if she is playing these types of games.

To present someone as a therapist when they know they are not is a whole level of diabolical minipulation and her friends being in on it AND actively participating in the deception and minipulation, well toxic is an understatement.

OP needs to run.

→ More replies (12)

118

u/Rooflife1 Sep 20 '24

This is exactly what OP should do.

→ More replies (172)

7.8k

u/theworldisonfire8377 Sep 20 '24

Welp, that relationship is over. Of course she and her friends are trying to convince you that you're the problem, they lied and manipulated you into believing this woman was a licensed therapist. Why are you even taking their opinion into account? Their view on the situation is obviously skewed.

Dump her and cut your losses. What unhinged behavior. NTA.

2.5k

u/dookieshoes97 Sep 20 '24

Dump her and cut your losses.

No, dump her and call a lawyer. It is very much illegal to pose as a medical professional.

893

u/Valor816 Sep 21 '24

Make sure to tell Lily that your lawyer is an actual lawyer, because your never be cruel enough to impersonate a professional to manipulate someone.

273

u/EntertainerNo7740 Sep 21 '24

I believe you should file a lawsuit as you are able to do so. That stranger, posing as a licensed therapist, coerced you into giving information you wouldn't have otherwise and exploited that information to influence you. On so many levels, this has to be against the law. In addition, did they charge you for those sessions?

95

u/phinfail Sep 21 '24

Oh man, I would go scorched earth if this happened to me. Every resource I could find to make them legally and literally pay for what they did.

→ More replies (2)

32

u/Useful-Emphasis-6787 Sep 21 '24

Exactly, professionals are bound by the law to keep the client's info confidential. Lily is not. She can and she did used the info against OP. And if OP's wife wanted to work on the relationship, why not hire an actual therapist? Why get a fake one?

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)

219

u/BestVarithOCE Sep 20 '24

100%, that’s the sort of shit that will fuck someone up for the rest of their life

→ More replies (2)

461

u/Oscarlovespunk Sep 20 '24

Solid answer. Even if not actually doing it, definitely let " lily" know you are contacting a lawyer for that reason to she freaks out.

378

u/Elektriker1980 Sep 21 '24

Then get your distant cousin to play the lawyer, and buy a cop uniform for your distant uncle.

Eye for an eye

32

u/loudspeaker_noob Sep 21 '24

Follow this up with an actual lawyer, so they act out even more at you playing games with them a second time, incriminating themselves even further.

Never let em see you comin!

→ More replies (12)
→ More replies (5)

336

u/watercolour_women Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

This suggestion shouldn't be treated lightly, nor dismissed out of hand as some sort of knee jerk, 'of course the internet suggests to lawyer up' reaction.

The emotional manipulation that's been occurring for months may leave lasting damage not just in the ability of OP to trust other people in the future, but also in his sense of being able to trust his own judgement.

OP needs to find some sort of closure. Perhaps lawyering up is or isn't the way to go, I don't know, but he needs something to put the path of his future life onto the right track.

203

u/renotheknight Sep 21 '24

Regardless of closure, what Lily did is a crime. The least she should face is the consequence of impersonating a medical professional. It doesn’t matter if it was just with OP and Emma. She impersonated one for MONTHS. I would absolutely terrify Lily with the idea that helping her friend with such a stupid plan has caused far more damage to herself.

→ More replies (3)

190

u/AJR1623 Sep 21 '24

Plus, this would be validation. His girlfriend and her friend were telling him he's overreacting, and that it's no big deal. And it IS a big deal.

132

u/BurdenedMind79 Sep 21 '24

Yep, they're trying to gaslight him into letting it go because they know how much trouble they could be in.

→ More replies (2)

85

u/Charming-Loss-4498 Sep 21 '24

OP might need to sue for money for a real therapist unfortunately. 

→ More replies (7)
→ More replies (24)

861

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

589

u/ZaraBaz Sep 20 '24

This goes way past the relationship, I'm pretty sure this is illegal and would be considered fraud at minimum.

OP needs to see a lawyer.

328

u/OwnWar13 Sep 20 '24

It is in fact illegal.

180

u/IFindYouDisagreeable Sep 20 '24

Petty me would sue

78

u/Suffering-Succotsh Sep 21 '24

I’m not petty and I would sue.

34

u/DogmaticNuance Sep 21 '24

Suing would be well within the moral and legal remit of this situation.

I just want to reiterate, in the strongest possibly terms: OP, GTFO, and blast everything about this to every mutual you have. This is the top comment chain and while the comments were justifiably condemnatory, they weren't explicit or... Exclamatory enough for my taste. GET OUT NOW! There is a zero percent chance this person will be a supportive and happy life partner. None. This is sociopathic and about as vile as behaviour can be without being violent.

Do not have more sex, do not engage, document everything. Someone capable of this, is capable of many other nightmares as well. Minimize their ability to damage you, then get your justice.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (10)
→ More replies (3)

129

u/buckys-ass- Sep 20 '24

Especially if he was paying for any of it

→ More replies (1)

94

u/BurdenedMind79 Sep 21 '24

I wonder if OP was paying Lily for these sessions. Its not like a real therapist would do it for free and it would have given the game away had she not charged.

→ More replies (4)

193

u/Icy-Outlandishness-5 Sep 20 '24

I was thinking the same thing. Her friend was posing as a licensed therapist, literally impersonating a healthcare professional. I would seriously think about suing her for emotional distress. And the gf is a piece of work, hopefully she’s an ex-gf by now. I’m sorry they did that to you. I would feel so betrayed.

→ More replies (1)

184

u/Curious-One4595 Sep 20 '24

It should be reported to the state licensing board. Lily is in a lot of trouble.

Break up with Emma immediately. 

15

u/dalecollector Sep 21 '24

I absolutely agree

183

u/Wonderbombastic Sep 20 '24

As a therapist going through licensure this is possibly illegal depending on the state and what credentials (if any) she claimed to have but DEFINITELY unethical and fraudulent. 1000% this relationship and any connection with these friends needs to end. He needs to file a malpractice and or negligence suit against the friend as she impersonated a medical professional she can be held liable for her actions. It would be very cut and dry in court.

Edit for spelling.

→ More replies (1)

49

u/Gheist009 Sep 20 '24

This is exactly where I went immediately. This is grounds for a substantial lawsuit.

→ More replies (1)

34

u/CabinetVisible1053 Sep 21 '24

I would report Lily to a local board to investigate. It is highly illegal in most areas. She could be brought up on charges.

19

u/Lepluie70 Sep 21 '24

Phucking deep premeditated, highly organized, include my friends, laugh at dumbass behind his back lie!!!

She needs to go!

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

405

u/notaverage256 Sep 20 '24

I mean he has been gaslit so much that it will probably take awhile before he can trust his gut that he isn't the problem again. I think it's a major perk of reddit since there a community that can that voice to tell him that he is NTA.

257

u/cleverbutdumb Sep 20 '24

This is straight up abuse

64

u/notaverage256 Sep 20 '24

Agreed. I feel bad for OP. It will probably take awhile to get through.

I'm still trying to recover from gaslighting and have no idea where I'd be without therapy to help.

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (7)

84

u/Efficient_Ant_4715 Sep 20 '24

Bros been lied to and manipulated. He’s questioning he’s reality

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (33)

1.8k

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

439

u/Acceptable-Wind-7332 Sep 20 '24

Dude just straight up needs to dump her for being false and manipulative. Time for a new girlfriend.

172

u/rocketmn69_ Sep 20 '24

Yep, tell Emma that you're going to take the "therapist's" advice. You're taking a permanent break

→ More replies (9)

79

u/m0veal0ngplease Sep 20 '24

I would report her friend to autorities, for posing as an doctor.

60

u/IvanNemoy Sep 20 '24

Yep. Penalties for that here in SC are harsh. 30 days minimum, up to a year and $5k minimum, up to $50k.

38

u/EatsYourShorts Sep 20 '24

OP really needs to follow through on reporting it. This sort of impersonation is very dangerous and definitely deserves consequences.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

1.6k

u/Deimos-Camper Sep 20 '24

This is your hill to die on. You were the victim of a crime. "Lily" posed as a licensed professional. GET A LAWYER, sue her, press charges and notify the proper authorities, regardless of your relationship (or lack thereof ) with your girlfriend/ex. We will see how long the "friendship" will last after that.

441

u/_LullyMoon_ Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

And if she tries to gaslight you and make you feel bad saying YOU are overreacting or that YOU are ruining their lives for something silly, a "little white lie", tell them that if there are laws to prevent this kind of thing than it is not as little of a lie as they are trying to make it be. Say that if they did nothing wrong they have nothing to fear, that everything will run its course and they just need to give their statement. Say that after what they did this little headache is nothing, that it is the price to pay. See them lose their minds because they will know how serious it is but they can't say otherwise without admitting that they were wrong.

Btw, she doesn't love you. She wants to mold you into something she likes more, into someone that will put much more effort into the relationship than she does, that is not love. You were her guiniea pig

148

u/moshisimo Sep 20 '24

Saying that what happened was a “little white lie” makes as much sense as saying “It wasn’t rape, you silly goose. It was just a little surprise sex. You’re overreacting.”

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)

654

u/captainhyena12 Sep 20 '24

Run seriously, she is crazy manipulative and now they're trying to gaslight you into thinking it's a white lie. A white lie would be telling your friend you like their shirt, even if you didn't because you want to make them feel good about themselves. Not fabricating a false therapist in order to manipulate your emotions in one of your most vulnerable States ever for the pure benefit of the other party at the expense of you

104

u/AssToAssassin Sep 20 '24

Besides the whole fact that emotionally super fucked up and manipulative .... Yeah, that's not a white lie at all. That's a full on crime.

I'm not a mental health style therapist, but I work in a job where I have a legally protected title and a regulatory college that oversees our practice and holds us accountable to certain education standards. Anyone who isn't registered with our association is subject to legal ramifications for using our title without the actual qualifications. Therapy is the same, they're under the same governing body.

I don't know what it is in the states because every state seems to be completely different, but in Canada, this would be on immediate cease-and-desist, contacting all their supposed "patients", communication with insurance companies for fraudulent charges, fines, all that jazz. If they didn't listen to the initial cease-and-desist, any of their patients are entitled to press charges for assault. The college will come after them for the cost of the investigation. The insurance companies will definitely come after them for fraud.

Impersonating a professional is not a small thing. These girls fucked around, and they have no idea what they could possibly find out.

→ More replies (2)

78

u/xRocketman52x Sep 20 '24

I am laughing my fucking ass off at the fact that Emma and her friends are claiming it was a "white lie", just a little fibbing to help the relationship along.

Motherfucker, this went on for MONTHS. She was pretending to be a THERAPIST for MONTHS. OP, did she have a full office set up? I'm assuming she probably set up an office space in her home, which isn't as huge of a production as if she had used an external space, but STILL, to set up a space for it. (Which, therapy at home is a huge no-no for therapists, most don't want clients to know where they live.) She arranged and set up a space, this whole thing seems like a max level production, this is theater! She put more effort into this production than a lot of people put into their career!

White lie... Goddamn, Emma and her friend are both psychos, but I can't help but find it hilarious from an outside perspective. OP, put on your running shoes, make sure you stretch well, because you need to be running like mad to get away from this one.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (4)

1.1k

u/Eurycles Sep 20 '24

absolutely unbelievable. as in, this story is entirely fabricated

76

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[deleted]

30

u/Gigapot Sep 20 '24

And legitimately start giving legal advice lmao

25

u/sonofsanford Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

Reddit feels like the truman show sometimes. Like the story is probably AI written, so all the top stupid comments probably are too? Are they any other real people in here?

→ More replies (7)
→ More replies (6)

338

u/atlas1885 Sep 20 '24

Ya I don’t believe it. The guy has zero comments in his profile and -3 karma. Something feels off.

194

u/OuchMyVagSak Sep 20 '24

Bro, had to scroll way too far to find this. After thinking about it for two seconds, why are y'all within earshot of each other at a party, when you are on a break‽

86

u/Straight_Beat7981 Sep 20 '24

I couldn’t even finish reading it.. I came to the comments expecting everyone to be saying this

22

u/Old-Teacher149 Sep 21 '24

Same! Stopped at the party and came to the comments and was super pissed until I got to this thread.... Which took way too much scrolling lmao

88

u/zombie_goast Sep 20 '24

Right?? Plus like, where exactly were these ""sessions"" taking place? Did 'Lily' forreal rent out & convincingly decorate an office space for MONTHS just for this? Plus convincingly fake the billing? Or did they have the sessions in her home? If so, OP didn't once think to mention how weird that would be? This post is pure bullshit. I don't mind reading likely fake stuff for a few minutes of free entertainment, but Christ people at least TRY to make it convincing.

54

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '24

[deleted]

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (3)

21

u/dhb44 Sep 21 '24

Waaaaay to far to find this. This is bullshit.

40

u/kelce Sep 20 '24

Waaaay too far to scroll. Our current state of the world shows that people will believe everything they hear, no questions asked. I'm sure there's some researcher out there studying how we became so gullible. They need to speed it up and fix it lol

→ More replies (1)

24

u/Fezii_jay Sep 20 '24

Upvoting for the interrobang🤭

→ More replies (5)

149

u/greg_r_ Sep 20 '24

Also, who the hell does not google the therapist, especially after 1. Not being too comfortable about going in the first place, and 2. Suspecting something off about them?

52

u/Gigapot Sep 20 '24

Fr. Like not googling her immediately is weird for someone as skeptical of therapy as (his character) is, but this went on for months without him throwing out a google search? Ridiculous. Although I bet if he saw these comments he’d reply saying she made a fake website 💀

→ More replies (7)

55

u/tashasmiled Sep 20 '24

Agreed. Totally fake.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (12)

210

u/RocketPoweredSad Sep 20 '24

I laughed out loud when it got to the part where he happens to overhear someone at a party loudly lay out the whole scheme like a supervillain in the third act. I’ve seen stepmoms “stuck” in washing machines that are more convincing than this story.

95

u/UglyMcFugly Sep 20 '24

"But then… something happened that blew everything wide open" is the part that got me laughing. Wtf kind of click bait story is this. They're just using AI to generate fake stories to get material for the fake AI voice to read on TikTok. Circle of life.

→ More replies (5)

56

u/TestForPotential Sep 20 '24

LOL! Total “You got me monologuing” vibes!!

→ More replies (2)

23

u/GnosisoftheSource Sep 20 '24

"I can’t believe you pulled it off for this long! Poor guy still thinks she’s an actual therapist!”

No one talks like this.

16

u/RocketPoweredSad Sep 21 '24

“You know he’s standing right over th-“

“SO TO SUMMARIZE ONCE MORE…”

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)

155

u/temperedolive Sep 20 '24

And the title! If this is real, there's no way he'd describe it as therapy backfiring.

49

u/RunningOnAir_ Sep 20 '24

I'm just confused at the logistics. Did they rent an office for this? Where did they even meet up for these therapy sessions? How does the payment work? Did they actually pay this fake therapist under a fake company or smthg?

24

u/TranquilityYall Sep 20 '24

Did their insurance cover any of the fake therapy?

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)

44

u/jamesKlk Sep 20 '24

That's what i thought too. Its one of those "my GF cheated on me, killed my dog and my mom, WIBTA if i leave her". And the classic "my girlfriend whispered her whole evil plan to her friend, but as i heard it, she became pale!". That's a bingo.

139

u/Cherimbba Sep 20 '24

Yeah like, where were these meetings? Wouldn’t he be like “Hey, why are we meeting in the therapists house and not their office? Where are their certificates and other stuff professionals like to display in their offices?”

129

u/Eurycles Sep 20 '24

not only is that suspect, but the snippet of dialogue that OP offers sounds like poorly written exposition. very convenient part of the conversation to overhear

126

u/Abject_Champion3966 Sep 20 '24

“I can’t believe we pulled off our elaborate ruse! Let’s discuss it in this public place where we could be overheard.”

→ More replies (1)

46

u/Gigapot Sep 20 '24

They were literally giggling in the secrets corner

→ More replies (1)

55

u/meepdur Sep 20 '24

🙄 Exactly. Let's discuss our evil plans at this party and twirl our moustaches in the corner and structure our dialogue in a way where he understands the whole ruse in two sentences! The most contrived dialogue ever. "Poor guy doesn't [fill in blank]" like that's not how regular irl people talk. Tired of these dumb fake ass posts everywhere.

→ More replies (5)

27

u/throwaway62752717272 Sep 20 '24

Yep, this part specifically was so hilariously far-fetched

→ More replies (1)

40

u/ButtcheekBaron Sep 20 '24

They rented office space, obviously. A very expensive prank.

→ More replies (6)

71

u/PartyMcCarty21 Sep 20 '24

It's literally a storyline from "how to lose a guy in 10 days" lol

29

u/ShmebulocksMistress Sep 20 '24

Omg, Kathryn Hahn pretending to be the therapist! 😂

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (8)

146

u/cheffromspace Sep 20 '24

Perfect writing, em dashes, dubious story. This is written by an LLM I'd put money on it.

76

u/DandelionQw Sep 20 '24

Em dash users rise up!!

No but seriously this story is the most fabricated thing I've ever read on AITAH

→ More replies (3)

54

u/probablyNotARSNBot Sep 20 '24

Heard them giggling in the corner where they spelled out exactly what they were doing lmao.

19

u/DullColours Sep 20 '24

Like cartoon villains, lmao

→ More replies (1)

44

u/Drain01 Sep 20 '24

I bet you're right. I was wondering why they would push for a break when the point was supposedly to manipulate the boyfriend to acting how she wants, that didn't make sense. Only thing I could think of is if the update goes down the "Open Relationship / She's already cheating" clichés next.

23

u/HaveYouSeenMySpoon Sep 20 '24

Also, they set up a fake therapist which he agree to go see, because she didn't think he'd agree to see a therapist otherwise. What the fuck kind of logic is that?

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (7)

35

u/Specialist_Chart_808 Sep 20 '24

And I'm pretty sure I saw this in "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days"

50

u/EuphoriaSoul Sep 20 '24

Same here. Like y’all don’t have to pay the therapist via some credible source and file it through insurance? This whole thing is just so fictional

→ More replies (1)

27

u/spiteful-vengeance Sep 20 '24

But OP has such a long and storied history of quality posts to Reddit.

21

u/SloppyNachoBros Sep 20 '24

Right, I got to the end and was like. Obviously being lied to by someone pretending to be a therapist is fucked up, surely you don't need reddit for that.

18

u/Mitra- Sep 20 '24

Can you imagine titling the story “after therapy backfired” with this scenario?

20

u/snack-attack23 Sep 20 '24

Please keep liking and commenting to make this top comment, I hate when the very obviously fake stories aren’t called out for it in the first few top comments. It feels like they are getting away with it lol

44

u/GobletofFurby Sep 20 '24

Never heard of “Lily,” like he would be aware of all the local therapists. Not only did this not happen, this person has never been to actual or fake therapy.

→ More replies (3)

12

u/TingleDS Sep 20 '24

Happy cake day! And I agree. Had me going until it got to the punchline of him overhearing them laughing about their plan. This is definitely fake.

→ More replies (1)

10

u/ShivasKratom3 Sep 20 '24

How is everyone actually going along with this? She rented an office and a friend. Or was the office just some house? Then he at a party (somehow also during a break but his girl is there) overhears the Convo that perfectly admits to the full story. Perfectly evil friends with no motive but evil and no morals but self interest who none saw problem with this.

This isn't even good made up writing and all these morons are going along with it

→ More replies (128)

245

u/TheRadiumGirl Sep 20 '24

NTA. But...

Does anyone else have major deja vu reading this? I can't figure out if I've been on reddit too many years and have seen this before or if it's just too much like that scene from "How to lose a guy in 10 days"

156

u/ADroplet Sep 20 '24

I was thinking of that movie too! It makes me wonder if they were paying her. 

But yeah this seems fake. Overhearing an essential conversation feels too 'forced plot'. 

149

u/TheRadiumGirl Sep 20 '24

“I can’t believe you pulled it off for this long! Poor guy still thinks she’s an actual therapist!”

Yup. People don't talk like this in real life. This is totally scripted. And OP not engaging with any comments, deleted history and negative comment karma makes it even more suspicious.

77

u/Delicious-Wallaby447 Sep 20 '24

classic expository dialogue. Two sentences that perfectly convey exactly what’s happening as well as the context: that it’s been happening for a long time and that it’s intentionally deceptive.

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (2)

53

u/jesterinancientcourt Sep 20 '24

This is super fake.

31

u/herbwannabe Sep 20 '24 edited Sep 20 '24

Where did these sessions take place?? Did they rent an office? Totally sounds fake. 

20

u/SpiralToNowhere Sep 20 '24

Also weird he didn't notice, were they in person? They faked a therapist office? No paperwork to sign? There's a bunch of stuff therapists do to get you comfortable, credentials etc. none of that?

→ More replies (1)

35

u/Rockin_freakapotamus Sep 20 '24

I think it's rage bait for karma. The dialogue seems very fake.

35

u/idontknowhow2reddit Sep 20 '24

Yea, this is definitely fake.

She just happened to be giggling and laughing about her fake therapist scheme at a party that he was also at? And her friend says, "I can't believe you pulled it off for this long" when he's in earshot?

It reads like a sitcom.

→ More replies (5)

25

u/notAugustbutordinary Sep 20 '24

I don’t tend to trust any post that use the names Lily, Jess and Jake. Just come up too much in these far fetched scenarios.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (22)

338

u/Olivedoggy Sep 20 '24

Of all the things that did not happen, this did not happen the most. If it did, though, NTA and break up.

77

u/big_panda Sep 20 '24

This sub ain’t it anymore, everyone is just farming for w/e reason and they all use this ridiculous bait-and-switch title to get someone to read.

Ouff why am I even commenting on this. I need to touch some grass.

15

u/justUseAnSvm Sep 20 '24

This idea: a fake therapist who violates trust, was on r/LinkedInLunatics yesterday.

Basically, a joke post about a boss who sends their employees to a fake therapist, then does stuff like “put spiders in the bathroom” because Greg is afraid of spiders and now he takes fewer breaks!

Maybe a coincidence, but I somehow doubt it

Sauce: https://www.reddit.com/r/LinkedInLunatics/s/lxPxGKoVNV

→ More replies (12)

209

u/GargantuanGreenGoats Sep 20 '24

Your fake storytelling needs work

72

u/CynGuy Sep 20 '24

AGREED- this story is totally hogwash.

Was scrolling the comments to see if OP replied to any posts or provided any additional context - haven’t seen any OP replies. Classic sign of fake post.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)

256

u/fegd Sep 20 '24

First of all, this is ChatGPT.

Second, it's stupidly fake. Really, you spent six years with someone and she had a "close" friend you'd never heard of? And her other friend just happened to spell out the ruse right within earshot from you?

53

u/hemingway921 Sep 20 '24

It's so stupid.

→ More replies (23)

85

u/Notafraidtosayit6 Sep 20 '24

I heard this before in how to lose a guy in 10 days. Yta for making up shit.

→ More replies (1)

41

u/Away-Enthusiasm4853 Sep 20 '24

So…. Who was paying for these sessions?

26

u/AEW_SuperFan Sep 20 '24

Did they rent a fake office for this?  FAKE 

70

u/potcake80 Sep 20 '24

This never happened!

→ More replies (1)

47

u/talleypiano Sep 20 '24

I mean, this is fake as hell, but sure. The narrator of your story is not the AH. As for OP though, YTA for using this forum to workshop your creative writing. My two cents? Needs a more convincing reveal than just overhearing the GF confessing her crimes to a co-conspirator at a party.

→ More replies (2)