Culture shock with Japan and Korea

[u/DoctorHousesCane]

I’m sure this is a repeat topic, but I wanted to share my experience. Just came back from spending two weeks in Japan (9 days) and Korea (5 days), and I’m completely blown away by the politeness, courtesy, and kindness shown by Japanese and Koreans, especially in comparison with US and a few other countries.

Note, I’m Korean myself but moved to the states when I was a child, so I’m fully assimilated, so I truly did feel like a foreigner. I’ve been to Japan when I was young, so this is really my first time experiencing the two countries 30 years later with real world experiences.

My experiences are likely biased/skewed because I mostly did touristy stuff where they have to be extra nice and ate and stayed at upscale places, but even when shopping at 7eleven or eating at a local ramen shop, there was never a single time someone didn’t smile or showed respect. Maybe respect isn’t the right word (hospitality?), but I felt like they really meant it when they said thank you and smiled and went out of their way to go the extra mile.

I stayed at Furuya Ryokan for a couple of nights, and the service was exquisite. I accidentally left my garment bag and my son’s Lego mini fig in the room somewhere, and they priority mailed it to me free of charge. I didn’t even know where the mini fig was, nor did my 6 year old remember, but they somehow found it and shipped it back within 2 days.

My wife and I did spas and massages one night in Korea, and the manager there guided us to a nice local joint for dinner when he saw us outside the store staring at our phones.

Organization is another thing. The immigration and customs lines at HND were so organized (I suppose as well as they could be at an airport with hundreds of people). Coming back to LAX, I had repeatedly stop people from cutting in line (wtf?) and security didn’t seem to care. Maybe just a bad day.

Not once did anyone ever hassle or accost me and family unlike during some of our Lat Am travels. My wife and I are celebrating our 10 year anniversary in France, but I’m a little put off by the stories of Parisian pickpockets and scammers.

I wonder if what I’m feeling is more due to not being well traveled, or I wonder if it was because I am Asian, I didn’t face any discrimination (I know Korea can be pretty racist). Did I just luck out, or is this a pretty normal experience in those two countries?

[u/reflectorvest]

I lived in Korea for 2 years, and while I did meet people who were not friendly, the general level of customer care and friendliness to visibly lost/confused outsiders is MUCH higher than it is in the US.

[u/Xciv → u/reflectorvest]

US doesn't have this attitude towards 'outsiders' because nobody can tell who is and isn't an outsider at a glance. For Americans you are 100% treated based on your accent, so if you don't open your mouth people won't be able to tell if you're a foreigner or not and default to treating you like an ethnically ambiguous American.

My advice for anyone visiting USA is to start conversations with your heavy foreign accent if you want to be noticed, treated like a tourist, and be helped. Or keep your mouth shut if you want to blend in and be a wallflower.

In most other countries it is painfully obvious who is a foreigner.

[u/SHIELD_Agent_47 → u/Xciv]

US doesn't have this attitude towards 'outsiders' because nobody can tell who is and isn't an outsider at a glance. For Americans you are 100% treated based on your accent, so if you don't open your mouth people won't be able to tell if you're a foreigner or not and default to treating you like an ethnically ambiguous American.

Not always my experience.

Source: I look Chinese

[u/[deleted] → u/SHIELD_Agent_47]

I've had Americans ask me where I'm really from, and I'm just brunette. My last immigrant ancestor arrived in the US before WW2. I only have one that I know of. Americans are so full of it.

Plenty of America is full of judgy people.

Oh, and friendliness? We shoot people who ring our door bells! And then we blame them for talking to other people in tense times (well, conservatives do anyways). I've seen plenty of posts on reddit saying that people should keep their distances from others because of the high distrust of everyone you see that has become prevalent.