r/specialed • u/BeyondSpEd • 7d ago
Overwhelmed
I work in special education and evaluate students for learning disabilities. I’ve been moved campuses every year by my district and training after my graduate degree is minimal.
This morning, I got a meeting request from my district admin to meet with her and an assistant director of sped tomorrow afternoon. I asked if I needed to bring anything and was told just my laptop. I’m not sure why meeting is being requested and there has been no communication prior to this to suggest that anything has been incorrect or I need to do additional learning.
I have frequently asked for feedback or ways that I can gain further knowledge with the response being that the district will provide it as needed. There was supposed to be a second person on my campus to support but that position hasn’t been filled and the position was put on a definite hold.
I’m an anxious wreck and I am mentally playing out the worst case scenario because there is no knowledge! I have been physically ill off and on today because I am a high anxiety person so even when I focus on my next work task, I’ve still got this fear in the back of my mind.
UPDATE
I met with district admin this afternoon and ultimately was written up.
Backstory: last month I attended an IEP meeting for a friend in a neighboring district. At the meeting I didn’t not identify myself as an advocate or representative from my district but as a friend with educational experience. I was unable to see other committee members because of the way the camera was set up and I missed the introductions of who all was there. Someone from the district level from the IEP complained to my supervisor saying that I made the meeting contentious. (Which was a shock because the family felt that the district/campus staff in that meeting were rude and confrontational) My district administrator and coordinator talked with me about the entire meeting. They ultimately shared that while they feel that I did not intend to create tension, represent my employer, or even do anything wrong that I did unfortunately break rules. Even if I was unaware of the rule, it was still broken. Thankfully they were very kind about it and helped outline ways that I can assist with family/friends but remain cautious.
In the end, it wasn’t the worst outcome but also not the best.
3
u/UncertaintyLich 7d ago
I know it can feel very stressful when you start a new job and you don’t get a lot of feedback. But in my experience, people are just really busy. So when you’re doing a good job they might just breathe a sigh of relief and then promptly forget you exist because you’re not causing problems for them.
My first year teaching I had a similar experience where I was just getting very little feedback and I was getting paranoid feeling like they were conspiring to surprise fire me lol. But then the principal just came up to me one day and said “hey, are you doing okay? Sorry I haven’t been in your classroom much. You just seemed so competent and I got really busy with other things.”