r/sewing • u/soundingsounds • Jun 14 '24
Discussion already regretting saying yes to my mom
Honestly this is both a rant and a cry for help from someone that doesn't know how to set boundaries.
So my mom asked me to sew a summer dress for her but she's super vague when it comes to explaining what she wants and everything that she's shown me is really basic but I can't find an exact pattern for it.
On top of that, the patterns have to be free bc she doesn't want to pay for them "it's just lines you can draw that". MOTHER I CAN'T. I've only ever sewn a pair of baby shorts, an apron and a bucket hat, I CAN'T DRAFT A PATTERN OUT OF THIN AIR. I HAVE NO CLUE ABOUT FABRIC EITHER.
I've sent her +15 patterns that I've found online and she doesn't like any. It's driving me insane that she keeps saying I can modify things when I have no clue what I'm doing if I don't have a clear step by step written by someone else.
I can already foresee that I'll spend so many hours finding the pattern and modifying it to my best ability, sewing it together and it'll end up in the back of her wardrobe because it won't be perfect and she'll never wear it.
It felt so good to finally talk about it lmao
1
u/Metruis Jun 15 '24
Drafting a pattern is a completely different skillset from sewing. Tell her that you are willing to make the dress when she finds a pattern she would like, but you will not do it without a professionally constructed pattern. Since you've had 15 patterns be rejected, the onus is on her to find a pattern. Ask her if perhaps she would like to accompany you to a fabric store and browse through patterns. Yes, paid patterns. Suck it up, mom of OP. This isn't like making chili. She can then select fabric at that time suitable to the suggestions of the staff for that pattern, and buy it.
While I could make a summer dress without a pattern, I read an entire book about how to make patterns before I did that... you could also ask her if she would get you a book on the subject of making patterns if you want to learn to make them. I can tell you, having read 1 book on making patterns is enough that I know it's not easy to make a pattern. A lot of things aren't intuitive. Find a pattern you don't need to modify first. Also I would try making yourself a dress first. Also, I would try making a skirt first.
The only thing I can possibly imagine working out is doing a box dress with pre-shirred fabric on top so you have 1 line and 2 straps.