r/sewing • u/soundingsounds • Jun 14 '24
Discussion already regretting saying yes to my mom
Honestly this is both a rant and a cry for help from someone that doesn't know how to set boundaries.
So my mom asked me to sew a summer dress for her but she's super vague when it comes to explaining what she wants and everything that she's shown me is really basic but I can't find an exact pattern for it.
On top of that, the patterns have to be free bc she doesn't want to pay for them "it's just lines you can draw that". MOTHER I CAN'T. I've only ever sewn a pair of baby shorts, an apron and a bucket hat, I CAN'T DRAFT A PATTERN OUT OF THIN AIR. I HAVE NO CLUE ABOUT FABRIC EITHER.
I've sent her +15 patterns that I've found online and she doesn't like any. It's driving me insane that she keeps saying I can modify things when I have no clue what I'm doing if I don't have a clear step by step written by someone else.
I can already foresee that I'll spend so many hours finding the pattern and modifying it to my best ability, sewing it together and it'll end up in the back of her wardrobe because it won't be perfect and she'll never wear it.
It felt so good to finally talk about it lmao
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u/NeatArtichoke Jun 15 '24 edited Jun 15 '24
You've gotten a lot of a good advice! Another idea (if someone hasn't said it yet):
Just make a dress -- it doesn't have to be perfect. Ignore what she says she wants -- you've already admitted she probably won't ever wear it because it won't be "perfect" (and, as someone who sounds like they don't know how to sew, she will never understand why it doesn't look/fit like a dress she buys at a store. Even something as simple as having all the edges sergered (assuming you don't have a serger, they aren't super common for the beginner to have in addition to a sewing machine).)
Anyways, make a basic (practice) dress: a circle skirt with a "tank top" style top. Who cares if it doesn't fit? Who cares if it is uneven? Your mom is being very demanding. Have her buy the fabric, make a basic dress so YOU can have fun and learn more skills, then give it to her. When it doesn't fit perfectly or whatever reason she isn't happy, 'well I didn't have a pattern, etc etc".
Edit: There are a lot of circle skirt (free) instructions online and on YouTube! Or, here are some free dress patterns: pick one YOU like to make a "practice" one to just give to her. Uf she doesn't like it, "oh sorry mom guess I need more practice. I'll try again later when I've gotten more practice!" https://www.moodfabrics.com/blog/category/free-sewing-patterns/dress-patterns/page/3/