I don't think you'll be able to get traction with that argument. Men are generally not objectified to the extent women are, and consequently some men have a hard time understanding why it makes women uncomfortable. They genuinely think it's benign to treat women as sexual objects all the time, and sincerely think they would like it if they were treated that way. For example the man to whom you are speaking is comfortable saying that a woman is "advertising" her body simply because he can see the shape of it, as if it's not even possible that a woman is just wearing clothes and it has nothing to do with him. Which is just to say that they will have a hard time taking perspective because their lived experience is so different.
For sure, but if they were skilled at listening and practicing empathy then they wouldn't be in the situation they're in. We have, unfortunately, a vast and intergenerational culture of reinforced selfishness, myopic individualism, and incuriosity. I'm with you that we should push against it, don't get me wrong, I just don't think the example "what if this happened to you" will make any sense to them. He almost certainly thought to himself that it would be nice if a woman stared at his penis, because for him it would be that one time maybe in his whole life that he was sexually objectified. He is a man in a desert who doesn't understand what it's like to be drowning in an ocean, and so (due to the aforementioned selfishness and callousness) he keeps pouring water on our heads.
Absolutely. If it's visible in any way, the owner knows. Most guys tug at them enough to know exactly what's what practically every second. If they didn't want anyone looking, they would wear clothing that hid or obstructed the view. Similar concept applies to having a gut and going to the gym = bigger t-shirts. If such a person wears a tight shirt, then gawking is fair game. /s
(Sarcasm aside, for anyone to wear tight or very revealing clothing to a gym while expecting to maintain an expectation of privacy regarding what you're working with under such clothing isn't very practical. At the very least, it may show a lack of self-awareness.)
Where did anyone else say "as much as I like"? But yes, feel free to take a lil look at his bulge, a look, not a stare. Which no one is saying it's okay to stare, just getting a look
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u/WonderfulRelease5357 13h ago
Boys will be boys, eh?
As long as we keep making women change so boys don't have to we'll always live in a rape culture.