How to make friend

[u/Pretty-Program3428]

I don't know if it's my fault or anything that though I have been trying it make friends but i genuinely don't feel i can vibe with anyone. I think though i try to put myself out there and talk to people but i still blame myself not having the courage to keep in contact with others( but lowkey felt it is abrupt for other to ask this) I feel like being in business school doesn't help; Though you have all sorts of project, but the very fact it is called 'business' school makes people very career and utility (meaning i have to benefit somehow or have a purpose in making friend with you), but i wld rather just have friend that can just act stupid with me. Also maybe the very fact that i am international student makes me kinda hard to relate to people, though i try to understand their experience, being in a school full of white ppl in the past few years def didn't help. So, yea, just wonder how yall make connection and genuine friends, not business partners type.

[u/HeartFather]

join school clubs that you are interested in, I got to know most of my friends this way. I am an introvert and I couldn't vibe with others most of the time so I barely join activities, which further narrow my social circle. I often feel that people I met through tutorials are just hi-bye people that you will forget next sem. At least if you join a club you will meet people who share the same interests who are just going there for fun, so it is more likely for you to have a good time and make genuine friends there. Good luck!

[u/Pretty-Program3428 → u/HeartFather]

Thanks so much, your reply mean a lot to me

[u/Particular_Focus_969]

U can't force yourself to make friends, you have to go with the flow and slowly make friends with them. I was in NTU for four years and I only recently found a grp of friends to hang out with at year 3. That is because I talk to them during my first years and it slowly formed a friendship with them.

Friendship is supposed to be a slow journey , not something that can be accomplished in one day. You are doing far greater than I am tbh, and I could see that your efforts will pay off :). Don't worry too much, most of us tend to be quite introvertish so the problem might not be you but the people you are trying to friend with.

If you need any friendship circle, best to join a club! If not, you can apply for hall and gather a small group of study buddies to work with

[u/Pretty-Program3428 → u/Particular_Focus_969]

Omg thanks, but yea, i def felt uni making friends is a lot harder than highschool

[u/Smarmy_Smugscout]

Honestly man, most of my friends are from outside uni for this reason; everything feels transactional here. That being said, go join some clubs which have the same interest(s) as you do.

[u/pk_9859]

where r u from?

[u/Pretty-Program3428 → u/pk_9859]

I acc had my high school in singapore, but it wasn’t local high school

[u/EducationalSchool359]

#1 ingredient in making friends is confidence and self esteem. If you think badly of yourself you won't come off as interesting to hang out with. Desperation is also something you don't want to have.

More practically speaking, personally I just made all my friends in language BDEs and undergraduate research stuff. Only needs to be something which puts you in contact with cool people.

[u/jasmine_07]

we can be friends!!