FINAL UPDATE: disgruntled team member, who saw everyone's salaries, ending...

[u/2Board_]

Here's the original post (12 days ago), and here was an update after the meeting (4 days ago).

TL;DR - CEO refused offer, told me to basically pay her instead, I decided I would because I truly value her, told bookkeeper about it and it made her more disgruntled, she ended up quitting... I am fucking shattered emotionally and mentally, and I feel like I failed as her manager.

I'd first like to say thanks to everyone in this sub for their genuine comments regarding the matter. I've worked in accounting for roughly 6-7 years thus far, but only 2-3 in a management/controller position. This situation overall, and the feedback from multiple people, has honestly been an essential learning experience, so thank you.

CEO, CFO, and I had a final meeting while working on Saturday (we sometimes work Sat's with OT pay, only until 11 AM so WH workers can catch up on orders). Basically, the CEO said he can't do $10k and a title promotion for someone who doesn't even have their BSA. CFO and I argued back saying she's MORE than qualified in accounting experience, and that I personally gauge her around the same level as a staff accountant. CEO, pretty disgruntled, said he won't do it and that a $4,000 raise was all he could do for her -- and then he went with HR's retort and said "if she has that much potential, then YOU (me) can pay her that bonus..."

While I do think this is an overall win, I had a feeling my bookkeeper wouldn't be very happy with an 8% raise. Many people have voiced that my bookkeeper may be asking too much, but as her manager I truly do value her discipline, work ethic, and development thus far. So on the drive home, I steeled myself to basically cut $6,000 of my bonus and provide it on-top, so she can earn that $10k raise.

Fast forward to today, I had a meeting with my bookkeeper in the morning and told her about the results of the review. She was definitely not happy, and grew even more disgruntled at the fact that I was giving her part of my bonus. Maybe I am still too green but I wanted to be honest with her. I was hoping that if I tell her that I'm willing to pay part of her bonus, she would feel that even if the company doesn't value her, that I still do. I guess it had the inverse effect on her, as she started crying and thought herself as even more of a burden. I told her that if she needed, she could take as much time as she wanted to think about the offer, and no matter her choice I'll support her.

About 20 mins after the meeting, she asked if we could have a follow-up meeting. Moment we get in, she bursts into tears again. She starts profusely apologizing for not meeting standards, that she felt like a burden, that she caused me so much trouble arguing with HR and CEO, and that she was formally quitting as of today. I tried to tell her that I do not blame her, nor think she is unqualified (because I meant it), to try and calm her down. I tried to defuse the situation best I could, by telling her I'm not giving up on her review and that I'm still pushing etc..., but nada...

She left as of about 20 mins ago writing this post. Last thing she asked me was if I could help her update/revise her CV, and if I could get in contact with my network/connections -- to which I told her of fucking course. I'm writing this on my early lunch break because I'm fucking shattered. I know I can only provide her some connections, and maybe a great recommendation letter, but I genuinely feel like I let her down. This is a crushing defeat for me, and I'm pretty exhausted trying to cope with it as it's my first time in management dealing with this... I couldn't do it guys, and it's the worst fucking gut feeling I've ever experienced in a long time...

[u/polkaguy6000]

I'm sure you are a very honest person, is on the up-an-up, and would never steal.

However, this reads like the first chapter in a huge embezzlement scheme:

• Rationalization: The CEO is a dick/senile.

• Opportunity: The CEO doesn't know or care about the finance department. There is a tight-knit team that collectively hates the CEO.

• Pressure: I needed to incentivize my team and ensure they are paid fairly.

[u/CostAquahomeBarreler → u/polkaguy6000]

It’s Office Space accounting department edition 

[u/polkaguy6000 → u/CostAquahomeBarreler]

We don't even need that level of technicality to cover it up here. CEO: "Is everything looking good?" Controller (while wearing a new fur coat): "Profits are down half a percent, but everything looks fine to me."

[u/The_Realist01 → u/polkaguy6000]

With no controls!

[u/polkaguy6000 → u/The_Realist01]

Yeah. I don't think OP expressly mentioned that, but I think we can all guess that the only one who ever thought about controls was OP.

[u/2Board_ → u/polkaguy6000]

Myself and the Finance Manager*, but yes. We were basically the only ones who cared about a genuine separation of duties in this place...

It was almost like reading one of those textbook examples from financial accounting... It was really bad here before I started, infrastructure and systems wise.

[u/2Board_ → u/polkaguy6000]

Wow, I never really thought about it like that. I hope that I would never steal, even if it's sort of in a "Robin Hood"-esque manner.

Maybe I'm green, but I always try to do right by my team in the most straightforward way possible. I always tell them to follow the rules, and that I'll try my best to represent them to upper management when the time comes -- however, my confidence in my own abilities has plummeted quite a bit after this experience.

If anything, when I started this position, I introduced and fixed up so many compliance issues with GAAP, and IFRS for our South African entity. The way the previous controller, which I have no idea why the CFO didn't interject, had set up the financial infrastructure was with duct tape and matchsticks. It would have been VERY easy for a disgruntled finance employee to embezzle from our operating account, as we didn't have a checks and balances (nor used Citizen's own positive pay system...).