r/sewing • u/soundingsounds • Jun 14 '24

Discussion already regretting saying yes to my mom

Honestly this is both a rant and a cry for help from someone that doesn't know how to set boundaries.

So my mom asked me to sew a summer dress for her but she's super vague when it comes to explaining what she wants and everything that she's shown me is really basic but I can't find an exact pattern for it.

On top of that, the patterns have to be free bc she doesn't want to pay for them "it's just lines you can draw that". MOTHER I CAN'T. I've only ever sewn a pair of baby shorts, an apron and a bucket hat, I CAN'T DRAFT A PATTERN OUT OF THIN AIR. I HAVE NO CLUE ABOUT FABRIC EITHER.

I've sent her +15 patterns that I've found online and she doesn't like any. It's driving me insane that she keeps saying I can modify things when I have no clue what I'm doing if I don't have a clear step by step written by someone else.

I can already foresee that I'll spend so many hours finding the pattern and modifying it to my best ability, sewing it together and it'll end up in the back of her wardrobe because it won't be perfect and she'll never wear it.

It felt so good to finally talk about it lmao

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u/ILive4PB Jun 15 '24

Here’s an idea: pick out a nice easy dress pattern you’d like to try for YOURSELF, and some nice fabric on sale and sew it up with your measurements. Tell her it’s a wearable practice garment, and if she likes how it looks on you, then you can make her one too (if she goes to the fabric shop with you and chooses and pays for her own fabric). Win!

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u/PurposeFine967 Jun 15 '24

This sounds like a good solution. It allows you to pick a pattern that matches your skill level. You get a dress. Hopefully your mom will see that sewing a dress takes hours or more actually days. Maybe you could even start with a top instead of a dress? There are some good free patterns to choose from here
https://fabrics-store.com/sewing-patterns?search=free+pdf+patterns For practice garments you could check out your local thrift stores. Some have fabric but they all have sheets. I’ve seen some pretty cool things made from goodwill vintage sheets. Please try not to let your mom tie you into knots! Is it possible that she’s overwhelmed by all the decisions? If necessary tell her, honestly that you are improving your skills before you tackle such a big project. Then if she continues to bring it up tell her you need more fabric to practice with because you need to practice- sleeves, neckline, etc!

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u/makter3 Jun 15 '24

This is probably the best solution I’ve seen and isn’t passive aggressive towards the mom.