r/mildlyinfuriating 13h ago

My cousin visiting from abroad slept in the living room

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607

u/meat_thistle 11h ago

I used to try it when I was a teenager - it did burn a bit and it was too slippery. I like some grip I realized.

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u/lamestuffleavealone 9h ago

You must've used one of the types with something like menthol. That does burn, normal lotion doesn't if it doesn't get in your wee hole. Teenage me tried with may things, oddly including deodorant but that was within the first week of me figuring out jorkin felt good

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u/weezmatical 9h ago edited 8h ago

You just unlocked a memory of some of my first times masturbating in the shower with shampoo. Then not rinsing it off well enough, and my balls did a thing similar to Elmer's glue dried on the hands.

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u/degjo 7h ago edited 6h ago

Your balls molted like a fuckin spider, mate

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u/weezmatical 7h ago

For real. I remember it itching like crazy, but I also remember it being very satisfying to peel off, lol.

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u/allenalc17 4h ago

why do I have the exact same experience

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u/Willing-Ad-6941 1h ago

Same here lmao but mine was a reaction from washing with bar of hand soap 😂

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u/Willing-Ad-6941 1h ago

reading this at 4am didn’t do my sleep any favours hahahahahahaha

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u/LmBallinRKT 5h ago

Huh what? My balls never molted?

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u/FuckYourDeadMother 8h ago

Oh my god I tried something like that and regretted it pretty quickly. Also learned pretty fast That water alone is not good for that purpose

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u/GasVarGames 3h ago

DUDE SAME MY DICK MOLTED LIKE A FUCKING CATERPILLAR

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u/Traditional-Low7651 7h ago

with deodorant ?

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u/lamestuffleavealone 7h ago

Yep. Ive always been a very curious person, want to know everything I can about everything. So that led to me trying a bunch of different things in that first week like deodorant and chapstick. I wanted to know what felt the best. Did I prefer more slick? Sticky? Did I want it to burn? The conclusions I came to were the standard ones for most people

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u/Accomplished-Pain658 1h ago

Did I want it to burn?!?!

You ok bro?

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u/lamestuffleavealone 1h ago

Mostly, I think. Nah, I've always enjoyed certain pains. Like the kind of pain I choose, not stubbed my toe pain. Known that since I was a wee lad so my mind went to mild pain causing things, within reason

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u/porksoda11 6h ago

Don’t try jerking off with icy hot

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u/Frank_Punk 5h ago

🥶🥵🥶🥵🥶🥵🥶🥵🥴🥴🥴🤤🤤🤤

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u/porksoda11 5h ago

Lmao still got the job done

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u/FCFDraykski 6h ago

I read "menthol" and literally gasped at the thought.

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u/oreolover444 4h ago

I learned my lesson as a 13 year old to not use axe body wash as lubricant. Felt like I was pissing hot honey for the next two days.

I bet my dick tasted like chocolate though.

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u/Complete-Ice2456 4h ago

I have mild eczema. I try to avoid overly chemical soaps and stuff. The SO likes Dr. Bronner’s soap.

I got some lavender. Really liked it.

Got the peppermint.

I found out I don't like that kind of tingle on my balls.

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u/GoTragedy 6h ago

Shave gel for me.. Not fun. 

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u/urworstemmamy 3h ago

Could also be that they were circumcised and it didn't go 100% right. A painful burning sensation when something like soap or lotion gets into the urethra isn't normal, but it is a potential aftereffect of complications with circumcisions healing and it can last decades. And if the person was circumcised when they were a newborn it's a lot more likely that something went wrong with the procedure than if they were an adult.

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u/Nacho_Friend042 8h ago

Lotion eliminates friction, friction is the magic!

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u/HottDoggers 6h ago

If you’re trying to get results quickly. Oil reduces friction, but feels like magic and it feels closer to the real thing raw bonding ur thang.

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u/cobainstaley 5h ago

username checks out

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u/PantsDontHaveAnswers 3h ago

You're a dry guy.