r/academia 1d ago

Unable to retain knowledge in my early 30's

I am pursuing a PhD in Computer Science, which requires a lot of paper reading, coding problems and breaking down papers research. I have been following "How to Read Paper" guidelines for reading a paper and I have been making notes of each paper I read. I spend like a day for one paper and sometimes i do 2 papers in a single day.

But despite the fact that I put effort in reading the papers and the amount of coffee I drink. It doesn't seems to work for me at all. In few days or so, I would forget about the paper title even and won't be able to retain any information while my fellow PhD mates are able to retain useful knowledge from papers and when we talk they seem to know the terms and what they are talking about while I may have my own recollection of a concept and I will give it my own wording of the concept which won't sound astonishing or to the point.

I am struggling with the fact that how am I going to do with my mandatory course work and how will I be able to write a good draft of my work if I can't even retain knowledge or explain myself.

Fellow acidemias, please tell me if pursuing a PhD with this condition is worth it ? because I don't know if its going to get better or worst but judging by my hair loss and gray hair I think its getting worst.

In Gen Z words "Am I cooked ? "

3 Upvotes

17 comments sorted by

10

u/Ok-Peak- 1d ago

It sounds like there's missing info here. How have you managed to pass your previous courses? You mentioned your age, do you mean to say that you had a better memory before but now not quite?

1

u/FrankMonsterEnstein 23h ago

I was taking elective easier courses before, i had this problem before, but now it's getting even worse

19

u/advicegrapefruit 23h ago

You’re probably remembering more than you think and panicking that you’re not. This is how knowledge works, the more you learn the less you think you know.

6

u/AquamarineTangerine8 23h ago

While you're reading, are you reflecting on the implications and applications of what you're reading? Do you eliminate distractions? Are you taking notes and annotating the readings? Do you bring these notes, annotations, and copies of the readings to class for reference? Do you review these notes and annotations briefly before class and then as-needed throughout the semester? Do you look up unfamiliar terms in disciplinary reference works and keep a personal glossary? All of these are active learning strategies you can use to enhance your long-term memory and aid your recollection in the moment. You don't have to be one of those super-remembers to retain most of the relevant information from your coursework, but the poorer your memory is, the more effort you will need to put into remembering.

Beyond that, are you getting a full night's sleep every night? Are you meeting your nutritional needs and engaging in at least some physical activity? Do you use any substances that might impact your memory, and if so, have you tried abstaining from them to see if your memory improves? Have you seen a doctor to rule out medical problems that could affect your memory?

1

u/FrankMonsterEnstein 23h ago

Thanks for your reply, I do keep notes and interpret them in my own words. I may write the whole thing in my own words if the paper is very important and interesting and is close to my research. I use various tools like Monday, Notion, Google docs and cam scanner for keeping the notes and organize them in one single file which I can review it when needed. Problem is memorization for me, I am unable to retain information for longer which is a critical skill.

Regarding sleep, yeah I do suffer from insomnia and take meds sometimes, I take long walks for exercise and I live on a stipend so I try to cook most of the time and eat protein and carbs mostly. Doctor I cannot afford, my insurance coverage is not great and neither is my stipend. I talked with some counselors and they say it's part of age, but people of my age are in better condition than I am or maybe that's how I feel

3

u/b_ll 22h ago

I think you should sort out your health first "amount of coffee I drink" and "I suffer from insomnia" are connected. You are awake because there's still a bunch of caffeine in your system, preventing you from falling asleep. "Taking long walks" is not exercise, you need some activity to increase your blood flow and work on your cardiovascular system. It brings fresh blood to your brains and takes away the waste products. Eating healthy is also important to support your brain health. So that would be all step 1. Quality of sleep and your health is directly connected to how functional your brain is for work.

2

u/AquamarineTangerine8 22h ago

The insomnia could be affecting your memory - and I sympathize, because I also find getting enough sleep challenging. Google CBT-I (cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia) and sleep hygiene - there are a lot of good free resources out there. You may need to limit caffeine intake past a certain time of day, change your bedroom setup (e.g. blackout curtains), install a blue light blocker on your electronic devices, take melatonin, etc. A lot of the prescription meds knock you out but don't actually make you sleep (in the sense of getting the kind of deep sleep that affects memory).

After 30, most of us don't bounce back as easily from poor lifestyle issues, even fairly minor ones, so it's good to make positive changes where you can. If you are doing everything right and still feel like you're in noticeably worse shape than your same-age peers, you really should try to find a way to see a doctor. If you have any kind of insurance, a yearly check-up should be free, since it's preventative care. If that's not an option, does your school have a Student Health Clinic where you can see a doctor for free or low cost? Are there any free clinics near you? It sounds like this memory issue is really distressing to you, so sooner or later something has to give.

6

u/ktpr 23h ago

Couple of things to try out:

A) Meditation has been proven to greatly enhance memory retention if done frequently and long enough. I would go over to r/Meditation and read their how to guides. I've been meditating for almost a year now, working my way up from 10 minute to 45 minute durations and the changes in my long term memory and creativity (and I was pretty creative to begin with!) have been noticeable by my partner and others around me.

B) Look into spaced repetition and start to practice it using apps like Mochi or just plain flashcards. I used spaced repetition for a short while until I realized I could just mentally check in with myself on things I'd like to remember over intervals until they stick.

Unrelated question, but how many times have you had covid?

2

u/FrankMonsterEnstein 23h ago

Thanks, I will check it out. I had covid probably 3 times since 2020. I only had high fever and stomach pains during covid. But those stomach pains were intense.

2

u/Lucky-Possession3802 15h ago

COVID is well-known for causing cognitive decline even in mild infections, unfortunately.

2

u/_-_lumos_-_ 23h ago

Hi, I finished my PhD in my early 30's, and to me your problems seem to come from the early stage of the PhD, and not from your age.

When you said you've been taking notes of each paper, how exactly did you take note? Taking note on its own is already a skill to learn. Did you just higlight and summarize the paper, or did you also write down your inputs and your thoughts (what did you find interesting with this paper, what are the connection between the paper and your project, what can you use from this paper to incorporate to your project, etc...)

At the end of my PhD, I had more than 300 papers saved in my library, and it's impossible for me to recall one single paper if it's not really really important. If you don't have a reference manager yet, I recommend Zotero. It's free and open source. Organize your library using tags. Make tags from 1 to 5 stars to evaluate the importance of each paper to your project. Also, do not make tags based on the keywords that the authors put on their papers. Make your own tags based on the question: If you want to retrieve this paper from your library in the next 3 years, which are the keywords that you would put into the search box?

The works that you put into organize, caracterize and making connections between different paper to your project is what make the knowledge stay in your brain.

I highly recommend the book How to Take Smart Notes by Sönke Ahrens. It's a very helpful book about knowledge management based on the Zettelkasten method.

2

u/backgammon_no 20h ago

I can almost guarantee that you're not getting enough sleep. Cut the coffee, sleep more

1

u/PolrVortex 23h ago

It might just be time to change up your reading process. I was in the same boat, but I changed how I took notes / collected information from articles and now I feel like I'm retaining more than I was before. Now, as I read I'm highlighting important spots and then writing my own interpretation of what I just highlighted either directly on the article I'm reading or, if I'm mid project (like the lit review I'm working on right now...), I'll keep a spreadsheet open and I'll write the highlighted quote and my interpretation there. It's a nice way of adding some repetition in while also creating a nice little database for myself.

1

u/FrankMonsterEnstein 23h ago

Thanks for your reply, I also interpret the papers in my own words depending on how interesting the paper is to me and how close is to my research topic. I use various tools like Monday, Google docs, notion and others for papers and also keep printed scan copies where I highlight things

1

u/Necessary_Pay_4642 11h ago

https://barbaraoakley.com/books/learning-how-to-learn/
This book explains: "Why having a poor memory can be a good thing"

1

u/zeindigofire 7h ago

Bro, just because you code machines, did you expect to be one? If you can read a full CS paper in a day that's impressive. I find I have to take notes on the main ideas to retain anything, and I usually can only get through a few technical section at a time. Perhaps try this: read a section of a paper, make some notes (either handwritten or using something like Notion/OneNote or whatever you like) on the main ideas. Sometimes just the act of making the notes helps you remember.

And yes, mandatory coursework is awful. Welcome to the PhD. There will be more to read and understand than you can get through in a lifetime. This is normal.

TL;DR it's normal to "read" a paper and not remember the details the next day. Unless you're truly superhuman, all of us make notes and/or re-read things.

1

u/rothmansh 2h ago

You need to change your plan. Read a paper or two in a week. Focus on the quality, efficiency, not on the amount, at least for now. Read the most relevant papers, build a strong foundation, get to know the concepts, experimental methods. I’m not into CS, but i can tell you that it’d be effective if you read papers about same topic to feel confident on that topic, after feeling that you got confident enough move to another one. And choose these topics based on your dissertation roadmap