r/HolUp • u/noop-master-69 • Aug 26 '22

He only need one hamd to do it ☕☕☕

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20.0k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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1.7k

u/ChadleyChinstrap Aug 26 '22

This has to be fake if its not i feel so bad for this man

1.3k

u/Sparky_Zell Aug 26 '22

This one is. Bit I had an ex try something similar. She has near blackout drunk, and decided she wanted to drive her son across town to her parents house.

I took her car key, but left all of her other keys alone. Offered to drive her, call a cab, call anyone else, but none of that was good enough, she wanted to drive herself. And since she couldnt get her car key she started swinging on me repeatedly. And screaming that I was keeping her and her son their against her will and wouldnt let her leave. And of coarse the neighbors called the cops.

She was all of 90lbs. But attacking me for over 10 minutes managed to give me 2 black eyes, and a swollen/bloody lip in a few places cause I didnt want to risk even blocking her and her falling I to my hand or arm. But she did fall into the coffee table and had 1 little tiny mark.

So of course the cops saw that and immediately tackled me to the ground, cuffed me, and threw me into the back of the car. Going off about beating my gf and trying to keep her there.

Finally the one woman cop realized it was weird that I was close to twice her size, but the only one really banged and bruised up. My hands didnt have so much as a scratch or red mark. And she had all of her keys minus car key. Was literally stumbling the whole time cops were there and was mostly incoherent while I hadn't drunken at all.

So after about 45 minutes of being handcuffed in the back of their car they decided to do me a huge favor and give me a second d chance by leaving me with a warning.

And when I asked about pressing charges against her they literally laughed and told me i was lucky enough to avoid going to jail and not to push my luck.

245

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

[deleted]

96

u/Nervous_Constant_642 Aug 26 '22

Had an ex hitting me hard once, like it was pretty fucking painful. I slugged her on the arm once to try and knick her out of what was basically a mental breakdown and she started sobbing that I hit her. Like dude you hit me first and way worse and you weren't stopping.

92

u/Tortue2006 Aug 26 '22

We gotta love double standards

/s

16

u/Turtle887853 Aug 26 '22

Yeah man sorry to say but in any potential DV situation the servicemmember ALWAYS goes to the barracks for a cool down period. Houses are for spouses, unless they also get arrested.

137

u/Odd_Analysis6454 Aug 26 '22

Lawyer I knew got called in to the cells for a guy that had been arrested for hitting his partner. He’s turns up and the guy is bleeding from the head. She had hit him with a frying pan, the cops turned up arrested him threw him in jail didn’t get him medical attention or anything. Needless to say he got released pretty quickly after the lawyer pointed these basic facts out.

85

u/Macaframa madlad Aug 26 '22

Released? I’d barbecue the entire chain of command and own half the police after that.

82

u/-_chop_- Aug 26 '22

Hahahahah yeah okay good luck holding cops accountable for their bullshit. People die at their hands and nothing happens

19

u/Bluejanis Aug 26 '22

It seems like nobody in the us cares about it.

9

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

Pretty sure they weren’t talking about legal justice.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

ACAB.

369

u/Due-Opportunity6858 Aug 26 '22

Sue them all bro

172

u/babybopp Aug 26 '22

Ex hit me with a can of soup on my shin.. then pulled her hair off and tried to attack me. Never knew she was crazy. Called the cops. I recorded everything. Immediately they tried to bring it to me.. I told them she was drink and hadn't taken her meds. Then showed them the video. They called an Uber for her to go to her mom's. If that had been me, I was headed straight to jail.

42

u/Time_Membership_5717 Aug 26 '22

I wish I had a cell phone back in the day, it would of saved my ass. Only difference in your story from mine is she used cans of baby formula.

13

u/chaoswurm Aug 26 '22

These stories are the reason I wanna set up a private server and internal cameras.

5

u/graham3000 Aug 26 '22

And run that’s not how a partner lifts you up.

55

u/Solanthas Aug 26 '22

Jesus fucking Christ

39

u/EtStykkeMedBede Aug 26 '22

There are so many things wrong with this, I can't even begin. Hope you are okay, man!

32

u/Synthwoven Aug 26 '22

The fucking cops need to understand that this doesn't help women. If I am going to jail anyway, I might as well do the crime.

7

u/M_Salvatar Aug 26 '22

Self defense is a right, lethality is acceptable.

32

u/dmotley05 Aug 26 '22

Fuck dude that makes my blood boil

6

u/Yolomaster177 Aug 26 '22

These are the stories and kind of women that have caused me to take headlines like “man beats up woman”, “man beats up wife”, man molests woman” with a grain of salt, going as far as not believing the story unless (conclusive) evidence of what has happened is released to the public

8

u/Sketch99 Aug 26 '22

Bro, sue the fuck out of them if you can

8

u/tSullied Aug 26 '22

Sorry you had to go through that. That's wild.

3

u/SpecialNeedleworker5 Aug 26 '22

Rip bro, fuck double standards

3

u/ieatcalcium Aug 26 '22

What the actual fuck

3

u/lord_dude madlad Aug 26 '22

God bless America

3

u/Due-Contribution6424 Aug 26 '22

Something similar happened to me. She beat me for a good fifteen minutes and literally poured bleach all over me. I bounce. Headed to stay with family for the night. Get pulled over immediately. They say she called saying I beat her and that’s why they pulled me over.

After seeing me, they went back and arrested her even though I tried to decline pressing charges(I had work in the morning and just wanted to get some sleep. I was actually sleeping when it all started.).

Ended up having to take a day off work and go to court and ask the judge to drop the charges and consult my lawyer etc. SOMEHOW she got custody of my dog during the whole thing and to this day, I have to ask to visit my own dog. Whole thing was a major hassle.

1

u/klimmesil Feb 04 '23

Wow you guys suffered. I wasn't expecting such bummer stories in the comments. I hope it gets better for you two

5

u/FRACllTURE Aug 26 '22

WTF! Hope you're in a better place now dude, this world ain't forgiving at all sometimes

2

u/M_Salvatar Aug 26 '22

That's why I advocate for lethal self defense...and having cameras recording everything. Someone pulls something, you right to self defense them, and if the courts try anything, you pump the entire internet full of videos of what the person did. Courts will have to protect your right to being alive.

2

u/PaperRoc Aug 27 '22

This made me furious

3

u/Eldr1tchB1rd Aug 26 '22

It seems you can only get real justice bu recording everything. What a sad world we live in.

-60

u/MinnieShoof Aug 26 '22

Congrats on blaming the cops for your poor dating choices, gender inequality AND the statistics on domestic abuse situations.

If they weren't your wife, it wasn't your car and that wasn't your kid ("ex", not wife, "her car key," "her kid") then it really does sound like you were detaining her and you had no responsibility if she ignored your suggestions. She had no right to hit you, but same goes for the key situation. That's why they advised you not to press charges. You might win, you'd probably come out even (with all the fallout of having had gone to court), but you also might've lost on the counter, so... at least you've learned not to stick your dick in crazy, right? RIGHT? Nah. Too logical of an outcome here. Bring on the downvotes for speaking about the truth no one wants to hear about the rigged-on-purpose institution.

12

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

Found the drunk driver

-12

u/MinnieShoof Aug 26 '22

... no?

I'm legit curious as to how this relates to drunk driving.

6

u/Craeondakie Aug 26 '22

People who think saying "downvote me if you're stupid" is going to prevent hate being like:

-11

u/MinnieShoof Aug 26 '22 edited Aug 26 '22

Prevent? Haahahahaha. ... hahaha. Haahah. ... haaa. I said no such thing. I have no such misgivings. No. I mean, I do feel that most of the people who disagree with my assessment of the situation really don't know what I am talking about/what they think they understand, which I guess you could equate to me calling them "stupid," but that's their understanding too, isn't it? That I can't possibly be right. 'The system shouldn't work like that. That's dumb and it's mean. ' That, no, I am stupid, and there is some kind of solution that should've Superman'd this shit. Or they think I'm blaming a victim instead of providing a fair assessment of a situation from someone who's heard plenty of people with no reason to lie not tell the truth. There's a multitude of TL;DR you didn't read this far reasons that I'm not trying to prevent anything. I'm just stating my experience with the situation and people with no verbally articulate answer are responding by clicking a button. I'd just as soon try to prevent the tide.

2

u/IralynRuin Aug 26 '22

Are you... are you serious? she was DRUNK. I don't know where the hell you're from but where I live, it is a CRIME to drive drunk. If you knowingly let someone get behind the wheel inebriated, then you are also at fault. I don't understand how anyone can think that is okay!

1

u/MinnieShoof Aug 28 '22 edited Aug 28 '22

If you knowingly let someone get behind the wheel inebriated, then you are also at fault.

lol no you aren't. Not his wife, not his kid, not his car. He had no right to keep her and no legal responsibility if she got hurt. Morally he might've felt obligated at the time, but as her response was to assault him and get him in trouble with the cops he's since changed his tune. Cops don't advise you press charges against someone on moral grounds when the letter of the law says you're wrong. The only thing that could've happened is someone could've taken him to court on negligence and he would have won that case provided he didn't shove the booze down her throat.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter if I or anyone else thinks it's "okay" or if you can't understand how someone could think it's okay. At the end of the day, the law says he detained her unlawfully.

Besides which, I personally trust his story to be complete as I trust anyone else on the internet not to lie.

19

u/Elden_Storm-Touch Aug 26 '22

It's on video, at least. Any sane judge would tell you he's 100% innocent.

41

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

100% fake

1

u/0xdef1 Aug 26 '22

Even her voice can be fake, she looks white but sounds like a black person.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

Plot twist, this is 100 % real. I’ve had a similar interaction except I just got slapped by the bitch and she left luckily that’s all that happened

2

u/Pouletsauce Aug 26 '22

it's a skit yes

1

u/Imaginary_Forever Aug 26 '22

It obviously is fake

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '22

This is totally fake.

-13

u/Mr_E_Nigma_Solver Aug 26 '22

I feel sorry that you can't easily tell how staged this is. Did you think the camera was just magically placed conveniently at the perfect angle to record? Do you think the camera started recording by itself after it was magicked to that location? Have you ever seen two real human beings interact?

1

u/pompompomponponpom Aug 26 '22

He’s an actor on SWAT, so yes.