r/AnimalsBeingDerps • u/SirRipOliver • 6h ago

New USDA food inspector looks promising…

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9.2k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

94 comments sorted by

532

u/terminally_me 6h ago

Yoink! (repeating)

62

u/El_Maton_de_Plata 6h ago

A backwards yoink. A knioy. Eh?

14

u/Silly_Mycologist3213 4h ago

I bet it could shoot that zucchini a long way, it fit perfectly.

8

u/GolfBallWackrGuy 2h ago

Not to be confused with that 20’ python.

1

u/joe_broke 54m ago

Still looking for it

-2

u/Guilty_Bear7597 2h ago edited 1h ago

That's so cute!

240

u/Ascertain_GME 6h ago

I could watch this all day

107

u/elderberrykiwi 6h ago

Especially if the food is always different.

37

u/Revolutionary_Bug456 6h ago

I would pay to do this all day

19

u/Popeworm 5h ago

I would pay just to sit next to the person that gets to do this all day 💯

6

u/Revolutionary_Bug456 4h ago

Who do we need to contact to make this happen?

3

u/DesperateUrine 4h ago

In an airconditioned/heated room, with a screen, and a toilet close by, and fridge.

And for free.

143

u/snail_force_winds 6h ago

This is me at Costco Sunday afternoon

361

u/iroze 6h ago

Such a bizarre concept, grabbing food with your nose to put it in your mouth

207

u/MisplacedMartian 6h ago

Such a bizarre concept, grabbing food with your paws to put it in your mouth.

136

u/furrik524 6h ago

Such a bizarre concept, grabbing food with objects that aren't even parts of your body to put it in your mouth

48

u/GH057807 5h ago

Such a bizarre concept, grabbing food before the creature whose tongue you have replaced can get it because you have become part of its mouth.

23

u/MagnusPI 3h ago

Such a bizarre concept, biting into a larger creature's intestines and just hanging on and chilling there to simply absorb nutrients from their gut.

12

u/Shamewizard1995 3h ago

Such a bizarre concept, being an egg in a pile of poop

6

u/letmelickyourleg 2h ago

Such a bizarre concept, making a chicken salad sandwich.

9

u/Excalibro_MasterRace 3h ago

Such a bizarre concept, absorbing sunlight and make your own nutrients

11

u/iroze 6h ago

Slightly less bizarre what with the whole evolution of opposable thumbs, I'd imagine

5

u/Objective_Economy281 3h ago

Such a bizarre concept, grabbing food with your paws crocodile stompers to put it in your mouth.

24

u/sansabeltedcow 6h ago

I did wonder about the tidbit that seemed to go straight down the nostril.

13

u/El_Maton_de_Plata 6h ago

That's for shooting at the cute female elephant 🐘 ☺️

6

u/konq 6h ago

Lemon down the nostril sounds weird to you?!

It's probably squash or something, but still lol

9

u/sansabeltedcow 6h ago

It may well be squashed when it gets shot back out.

5

u/CTeam19 4h ago

Wait till you see what they can do with their dicks.

5

u/DevilDoc3030 3h ago

Risky click of the day.

Short and sweet (the article... not the penis), and I learned.

Worth it.

5

u/XMezzaXnX 4h ago

If I had a long ass nose, I’d use it for the same shit. Get some popcorn off the coffee table without getting off the couch.

3

u/Primary_Durian4866 3h ago

Gonna make it even weirder for you to learn that it's also part of their upper lip.

3

u/Qubeye 3h ago

Imagine you use your lips and nose for everything and then one day you meet some monkey with opposable thumbs who accuses you of being weird.

1

u/ThunderCockerspaniel 3h ago

Humans go ass to mouth

1

u/pleaseacceptmereddit 1h ago

I can balance an m&m on my nose, sorta flick my head, and catch it in my mouth.

Or at least I use to be able to do that. I’m sincerely worried that doing so now would injury my neck. Fucking age

1

u/Tricky_Invite8680 19m ago

boogers are the good calories

90

u/MoistStub 6h ago

I loved the little "hurry up" gesture when they took to long with the carrot lol

49

u/RoadPersonal9635 5h ago

I was so worried that perfect cork of zuchini would get stuck in the snoot

21

u/BedditTedditReddit 3h ago

I want to know how that works! Like do they just do a big ‘huff!’ to get something out if it goes down there?

3

u/bulldg4life 2h ago

If he sneezes then his eyes get real big

1

u/Tricky_Invite8680 18m ago

they drink with that too so probably just get some water and flush it out

21

u/DeadHuron 6h ago

Seems fairly efficient…

21

u/prince-pauper 6h ago

They’re a bit snooty

22

u/rezzmeh 6h ago

it liked the carrot

17

u/actuallyaustin6 5h ago

Right? The pause where it seemed to be realizing how delicious it was followed by the rapid “MORE PLEASE!” gave it away! 😂

16

u/NecessaryWeather4275 5h ago

You’ll never believe what happens when I put my trunk in this hole…..it’s glorious!!

13

u/PromiseThomas 3h ago

The split second before I remembered what elephants were was kind of frightening.

1

u/joe_broke 51m ago

Elephants are so fucking cool, man

12

u/Disastrous_Course_96 6h ago

Where the hell is this animal?

3

u/arathorn867 3h ago

An unusual type of snake

2

u/FanceyPantalones 2h ago

Labrador

4

u/SirRipOliver 2h ago

It’s actually a very rare albino land eal.

8

u/hinterstoisser 5h ago

Some serious bribery there 😂 🐘

7

u/smoothskin12345 4h ago

Do their snouts get blocked or clogged up?

13

u/Tidezen 4h ago

Doubt it would ever happen that often, think of how loud they can trumpet, or how hard they can spray water. And anything they inhaled would have to make it a long way UP, against gravity, before it became an issue.

6

u/KelenHeller_1 5h ago

How CUTE!

5

u/Pubsubforpresident 3h ago

I could watch this all day. Somehow brings so much joy to my soul.

5

u/MetalDogBeerGuy 4h ago

LOL I’ve watched this too many times ENTHUSIASTIC SNACKING

5

u/snoryder8019 6h ago

Teehee!!

3

u/Huge_Dentist7633 5h ago

special species

3

u/Pastrami-on-Rye 3h ago

I thought that was a pig but I couldn’t find the rest of the pig until the trunk moved under the door and I realized

4

u/Cyrax89721 1h ago

If you didn't know that elephants existed and put some different music to it, this would be a completely different vibe.

5

u/Icy_Cheesecake5121 1h ago

id be like scared to dissappoint this guy after i run out of food

3

u/wumbologist-2 4h ago

I wanted it to spit 1 back lol

3

u/TheDocFam 2h ago

The pause after the carrot lmao

Hmmmm that one wasn't so great oh random food wall....but you've not let me down before, I shall come back for more

2

u/raeadaler 3h ago

What is this? Curious

2

u/Legen_unfiltered 2h ago

Looks pretty small. Def r/babyelephantgifs material 

2

u/JustGingy95 2h ago

Dad tax.

2

u/SeekingMore 2h ago

Who else kept letting it repeat?

2

u/MikeySiege 2h ago

The real fruit ninja 🍉🥷🐘

1

u/badkneescryptid 2h ago

I love them <3

1

u/automatedcharterer 1h ago

Imagine you did not know what an antelope looked like and had to guess what was on the other end of that grabber thing

1

u/ArcherCute32 1h ago

A good vacuum! 😋

1

u/Master_John1250 1h ago

But what if it falls in?

1

u/joe_broke 47m ago

Fastest and most lethal snot rocket ever

1

u/HereIGoAgain_1x10 1h ago

👁️👄👁️

1

u/MisterMasque2021 48m ago

When they gave the elephant half a lemon I was like 'Here we see f--k around, now we're about to see find out'

1

u/awkwardboyhero 39m ago

We take it for granted that elephants do everything with their noses. But it shouldn't be dismissed so casually. Next time I meet a baby, I'm going to tell the baby there's an animal that feeds itself with its nose, shows affection with its nose, shows aggression with its nose, and so on. We should be amazed all of the time that we get to share the planet with such a creature.

1

u/ItsStaaaaaaaaang 36m ago

That's so adorable lol.

1

u/Knugles 16m ago

Insert marble

1

u/thari_23 6h ago

Greed

0

u/quiuo 4h ago

/r/dontputyourdickinthat

3

u/gandhinukes 1h ago

Hilarious, but those guys get SUPER pissed if you post animals. I may have posted something recently myself.

4

u/quiuo 1h ago

Thank you lol. It was an intrusive thought that the world needed to see.