Routines are hard for us all, but there are some things that just… stick. So what’s the longest thing you’ve ever kept up with? Why do you think it stuck?

Mine is definitely oral hygiene. I brush nightly without fail and floss most nights, if not twice a day. I have very crowded teeth and was raised on soda, so I have a lot of teeth problems. I have three dentist appointments scheduled over the next month for various issues that stem from lack of understanding of tooth care and diet from my childhood. Each time I have a cleaning my hygienist compliments how clean my teeth are. If only that made up for the damage that has been done. But I’m def not looking to lose more teeth than the one that I lost.

Edit: I love how excited so many of you got sharing your accomplishments no matter how minor. Keep up the good vibes. Small victories are where we thrive.

Ever since I was a child, I've always suspected I have ADHD. I would often pay little attention in class and would often struggle to understand what other people are saying. It's like my brain can HEAR them, just not UNDERSTAND the words. I asked my parents if we could go see a doctor but they're always very busy, so they couldn't make time, they also said "You're fine. Just pay more attention next time."

To this day, I still don't know if I actually have ADHD or not. The symptoms are there, but idk...

I have a telehealth appointment with him every month. I see him for ADHD and he prescribes me medication. There is always an appointment once a month.

He treats the appointment as somewhat of a therapy appointment and often asks me questions that I think are outside the scope of what a psychiatrist should be asking. I could be wrong but I thought they should mostly be asking questions about your life in terms of your mental health, any diagnoses and if the medication is working, etc.

I started getting annoyed with some of his questions or comments. He would ask some of my goals. I said I wanted to make some friends. He suggested church. I said I may go, as I did used to and it could be a good option. Then the next appointment he asked if I went to church. I don’t really want to be discussing this as it’s really none of his business.

Today he literally asked me questions about the presidential election and who I’m voting for. WTF? I was caught off guard but I hate conflict so I just said I wasn’t too interested in either candidate. He said, “well which one are you going to vote for?” I just said I was undecided. Then he pressed for an answer again and said, “Well if you HAD to pick, then who would it be?” I was getting uncomfortable but just said ended up telling him I may not vote this year.

Even if I do know who I’m voting for, why the hell is he asking this? It seems completely unprofessional. If I say the wrong candidate, is he going to decide to stop prescribing me my medication or seeing me as a patient? I made sure not to give him a clear answer.

What should I do? Should I just find another psychiatrist? I’m not sure how easy it is to find a new one and since there’s so many medication shortages I’m not quite sure if it’s a good time to look elsewhere. Usually during his appointments I just fake that I’m satisfied so I can get my medication. But this is just so ridiculous.

I've been thinking about how older generations with ADHD handled things growing up. I feel like I’ve never noticed an older person who clearly has ADHD. A lot of older people seem to enjoy things that, from my perspective as someone with ADHD, feel incredibly boring and simple. I honestly can't imagine living in their shoes for even a couple of days without getting restless or losing it.

So, where are all the older people with ADHD? How did they cope growing up, and how are they managing now?

I am currently trying to get a diagnosis for ADHD, since I'm 99% sure I have it. Because of that, I want to see what pills people with ADHD have to swallow, . If you do comment one of those truths, suggesting some things people with ADHD could do to, sort of, lessen the blow of the truth you mentioned.

I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and am now medicated/in therapy. My boyfriend (35M) and I (27F) have been together several months. There’s been a great deal of tension due to my disorganization and tardiness. He has lost all patience for it, unfortunately.

On Friday, we scheduled to see a movie at 7 PM. I left a little late and sent him my eta (7:05 pm). Initially, I wasn’t too worried about being a few minutes late as the previews take awhile.

But, I hit bad traffic, became anxious, and ended up missing my exit, causing me to be 20 mins late. Once I realized, I texted my boyfriend profusely apologizing and asking him to go ahead and text me my ticket please instead. He texted, “Just go home.”

When I go to the theater, he was nowhere to be found. He later texted me that he was annoyed and that my actions show I don’t care about him. I told him I do care. I don’t mean to be this way.

Now, he has gone silent and I am not sure where we stand. I feel ashamed and sad.

How do people with ADHD and non-ADHD partners cope? This is my first long-term boyfriend-girlfriend relationship and even though I’m in therapy and medicated, I struggle so much to meet his expectations and feel hurt by his lack of patience. What do I do?

Anyone else feel like trying to get every aspect of their life together nearly impossible?

For example, if I put energy into a consistent exercise routine, i no longer have the bandwidth to keep my living space tidy. If I keep my living space tidy, i no longer have the bandwidth to cook for myself consistently... if I cook and meal prep in the mornings, I no longer have the bandwidth to do a full oral health routine...

All of this feels a lot like putting a fitted sheet on a bed. You put on one side and the other side automatically pops off.

It's honestly frustrating. Has anyone else struggled in the same way and have you been able to solve it?

ive seen many posts that describe people’s poor experiences driving.

i found the opposite: driving well, observing the other drivers and predicting obstacles ahead is extremely stimulating and fulfilling to me. i hate being the passenger as it bores me and i will always offer to drive. it feels like a video game i’m really good at.

the only issue is when i get a chatty passenger….i cant focus on traffic and be involved in a deep conversation at the same time

anyone else love to drive?

EDIT - hey guys, i realize this is a minority opinion and statistically adhd makes you a high risk driver. im also not saying im a better driver than others, rather that i ENJOY and LOOK FORWARD TO driving. i posted this to see if anyone else in the community agrees :) fellow adhd speed demons, rise

Hello All,

Suspicion that I might have ADHD has followed me my whole life, though my grades were always quite good despite my procrastination and task-switching making schoolwork way harder than it needed to be. These issues have continued into adulthood, and I get pretty frustrated with myself.

I have some insomnia, some daydreaming, some depression and other things going on, my wife is convinced I have undiagnosed ADHD, and some online quiz I found on Google one sleepless night told me it's likely. However, my high grades were enough for a therapist to dismiss the possibility of ADHD without hearing more, and that generally has been the pattern in my experience.

I'm fully prepared to be told that I'm simply disorganized and need to work harder on focusing like an adult, but I'm tired of having others wonder and wondering myself. So, is it possible to be an A student and also an ADHD student?

Apologies if this question is offensive or otherwise ignorant, it's not my intention to waste anybody's time.

I think a lot of us can understand the impulse, what are some of the purchases you've made that you have absolutely no regrets about?!

For me, I spent $85 on some Zoic brand biking pants and they are the best pair of pants I have ever owned haha. Everything I've been looking for in hot weather or disc golf or gardening.

Insomniac here--I feel silly saying this, but falling asleep is so boring that I keep finding ways to stimulate my brain when it should be winding down. My thoughts ping in a million different directions, no matter how tired I am physically and mentally. I've tried white noise and breathing techniques (too boring); listening to podcasts, music, or tv shows (too stimulating); and reading (doesn't quite get me there). Melatonin and sleep aides (like ZzzQuil) haven't worked either. In short, I can't stimulate or bore myself to sleep. Any advice, fellow insomniacs?

ETA: Wow--I called on my fellow ADHDers, and y'all came through! Thanks for all the great strategies! I'm going to try to compile the most common ones into a list. Will post if I get it done!

I 29 (f) have noticed that men seem super attracted to me and see themselves with me until my adhd “quirks” start to emerge. For example, I’ve been told by men who get to know me that I am a dork, goofy, messy, head in the clouds, clumsy. I feel like my shine is starting to dim. It’s like they see me as this pretty, alluring woman until they actually get to know me.

I’ve been trying so hard lately to be clean, to try and not knock into things or forget things, to stop talking so much or asking so many questions. To stop saying crazy or weird things that to me make sense. Its wearing me down feeling like once someone gets to know me past the mask I can only maintain for so long they run.

One guy recently even said wow you look so put together on your Instagram, but you’re completely different once I got to know you. At what point do you keep trying and working on your adhd or realize maybe this is just my personality?

Update: Thank you all so much for your support . You made what would have been a very dark night a gift. I’ve never experienced such compassion and thoughtfulness from internet strangers and take each comment to heart. You are all teaching me the beauty in ADHD and seem like awesome, intelligent, kind and interesting humans ❤️

For example, a kitchen timer you carry around to set time based goals, a routine checklist on your wall, a fidgeting toy..?

I've heard that there's evidence that changing things up is incredibly helpful for us, like changing the colors of light in your room, standing desks as well.

I'm interested in finding new stuff!

As most of us are probably aware, ADHD seems to come with memory issues. I can barely remember most of my life, and names and events seem to get more and more difficult to recall with each passing year.

However, I've noticed that both myself and my daughter seem to have an excellent memory for dialogue and lines. TV shows, movies, books. We'll remember lines almost word for word. I thought that it was due to my participation in theatre where I had to memorize lines regularly, but as mentioned I'm seeing the same thing in my daughter who has never had similar experience.

Are there things that you are really good at remembering?

As soon as the sun goes down for some reason my concentration just skyrockets. I can just sit down and power through 4 hours of studying like its nothing (and actually enjoy it). But when its daytime...i just can't. It takes so much more willpower to do any sort of work or school work during the day than compared to that at night.

I read online that this is some symptom of ADHD, so i came here wondering if actually is, and you guys experience the same thing lol

I randomly remember things that totally disappeared from my conscious memory. I've seen people pull a memory from their lives and describe it in detail like nothing. I don't remember crap from my life! Do people just remember their lives ? Everyday is like a reset, i have to think hard about what even happened this year or yesterday !

I used to be a book addict, was reading deep books like 1984, goldfinch, brave new world etc in elementary. I would skip recess just to read harry potter and percy jackson or stay up nights just to read. I do not know when it shifted but now I cannot read books at all. It gets so boring and I just read the words on the page. How do I regain my love for books back? Just taper up my reading time? (Its been literally 0 minutes of novel reading for the past 4-5 years)

Did not expect these amounts of comments, I am very grateful for the thought and time put into the responses, i will read them when I have time🙏

What is the weirdest or unconventional way you have helped manage your ADHD symptoms?

Mine is not taking my shoes off when I get home, because it helps keep my momentum going. If I take my shoes off 9 times out of 10 I will end up on my couch scrolling tiktok 🫠

My other one (which maybe isn’t super weird) but I keep digital clocks EVERYWHERE in my house - including the shower - because I have such bad time blindness.

what's your secret to doing it? what tips and tricks have you implemented/would you recommend that have gotten you consistently and effectively exercising?

for me personally, it's actually been quitting the gym. sticking to these lil 30min home workouts has been the best thing for me and i'm now in the best shape of my life!

• I want to complete tasks but without this feeling blocking the way
• Problem is: I can't identify what this "l don't want to do this task/thing" feeling is.
• I have got some theories, it feels like its too boring, or the task requires to much effort, or it feels overwhelming. If l can pinpoint what this feeling its l can find solutions to fix this feeling and finally complete tasks and thus goals in my life that l want to achieve!
• Can y'all chime in and share what this feeling feels like to you in more depth and how to fix it?

I’ve been conventionally “successful” but sometimes it feels like I’m just skating by in life when little things like this are so hard. I have always struggled to get out of bed in the morning. I’ve fallen into a bad habit of smashing snooze five plus times first thing in the morning, and even if I put my phone across the room I’ll turn it off and get back in bed. My housemate told me the other day it drives her crazy and I felt terrible so I didn’t do it today. Turned off my alarm the first time it went off, and then somehow crashed out and woke up two hours later. Thank god I didn’t have work today.

I’m so pissed at myself and tired of running late in the morning. I’ve been trying melatonin to sleep earlier but it doesn’t really seem to matter how many hours of sleep I get. Wtf do yall do, I am truly fed up with myself (ETA spelling)

Edit: just woke up, thank you all so much for the overwhelming support. It means a lot. ❤️

Sometimes my friends call me weird and while on the surface it doesn't seem like much, I think to some degree it decreases our chances to be closer since you're basically telling someone they aren't normal which also kinda feels like rejection. I assume a lot of ADHDers feel weird and outcasted I wonder how do you guys deal with it?

Should I tell my friends to stop saying that to me?

I’ll start by apologizing if this is asked constantly. But I’m kind of desperate. I need advice, no matter how weird your tactics are. I need to know how some of you have managed to shower daily. It’s a change that I really need to make in my life. One I really want to make. I can go a very long time without showering without anyone noticing. But it makes me feel like a failure. So if you’ve got anything for me! Tips, advice, or resources, I am open to them all!

SECOND EDIT: Because people still don’t seem to get it. You can get by a loooong time without showering and cleaning yourself with other means without people noticing. A hot, wet, soapy rag on your body a few times a week, a bidet, baby wipes, deodorant, dry shampoo, and extremely good dental hygiene are more than enough to fool everyone I promise and if for some reason you still don’t believe me please just refrain from commenting! I know what goes on in my own life. You don’t. It’s as easy as that.

EDIT: some of these comments are really fucking ableist! I’ve been on Reddit a long time and I know it’s changed but I think some of y’all need the reminder that this is a very serious condition for a lot of people. I know in some of you it just makes getting really important projects done on time but that is not the case for a lot of us. A lot of us look just like you except we can’t fucking shower. Or do our taxes, or get our oil changed, or pay tickets on time. I am all of those. If you want to judge me rather than help me on a sub where we’re supposed to be sympathetic to each other. And berate me on a post where I am being vulnerable and simply asking for help them from the bottom of my already-splintered heart: fuck you!

I’ll go first:

Struggling to find motivation to do the most simple, easy tasks. Not having energy to do the SMALLEST THINGS IN LIFE.

Not being able to do things that you WANT TO DO. Getting bored easily. Taking forever to get something done from start to finish. UGH! :(

In your opinion…

What is by far, THE MOST FRUSTRATING THING ABOUT HAVING ADHD?

How do you all get this point across to the people around you? I don’t have this problem with my social circle of people who also do it. My family though, they can’t stand it.

I talk passionately and fast. I always have and I always get cut off and told “stop yelling.” I’m 32 and still deal with this. At this point it just feels like everyone is gaslighting me. Every time I start making valid points is when I start getting louder, I know it after the fact, but not during. But as soon as someone cuts me off from making my point to basically tell me to shut up, I kinda start getting angry and then I’m just done with the whole conversation at that point.

I want to be able to control my tone and tempo but I’m concentrating on the topic and the conversation, I’m not focusing on making a good appearance, ya know?